Tangled Webs
by NickandLiv
Summary: Elliot gets caught cheating. What does it do to Olivia?
1. Caught

**I DECIDED TO PLAY WITH JUST A FEW DETAILS HERE IN ORDER TO GIVE YOU GUYS WHAT I HOPE IS A GOOD STORY. KATHY STABLER NEVER EXISTED AND ELLIOT HAS NO CHILDREN. HE AND OLIVIA BECAME A COUPLE FIVE YEARS AGO AND ARE CURRENTLY MARRIED. I'VE ALSO PUSHED THEIR AGES BACK BY JUST A FEW YEARS, OLIVIA IS 39 AND ELLIOT IS 42. ELLIOT IS NO LONGER WITH NYPD. HE OWNS A PRIVATE SECURITY FIRM WITH BRIAN AND THE TWO OF THEM ARE BEST FRIENDS. BRIAN IS ENGAGED TO ALEX. CASEY NOW LIVES IN CHICAGO, SHE'S CHIEF ADA OF CHICAGO SVU BUT SHE, OLIVIA AND ALEX REMAIN FRIENDS. I HAVEN'T DECIDED YET HOW LONG THIS STORY WILL BE, IT WAS INTENDED TO BE JUST A ONE-SHOT, BUT WE'LL SEE. AS PER USUAL, DICK WOLF, NBC AND UNIVERSAL OWN THE CHARACTERS AND THE RIGHTS TO EVERYTHING. ENJOY!**

* * *

**HOTEL, DOWNTOWN CHICAGO**

**Olivia's POV**

Walking the corridor to Elliot's suite, the moment seemed surreal. It was as if the universe were somehow in slow motion but standing still at the same time, and, even the most mundane of things were now amplified times a million – the sound of my stilettos treading the Persian carpet that lined the hall, even the ticking of the antique clocks seemed as if they were the loudest sounds on earth; drowning out everything else within a 100 mile radius; everything except for my heartbeat. As I drew closer to the door my anxiety forced my stomach to contort, tying itself in a huge, painful knot. My heartbeat was now a frantic rhythm that was trying to pound its' way right out of my chest! I stopped three feet from the door and looked down at the key card in my hand - how nice it was of him to make sure that I was able to get his room key anywhere he stayed. He always wanted me to have access to him if I ever decided to join him on the road so concierge was always instructed to key me, no hassle if I showed up. However, his thoughtfulness was about to do him in - idiot forgot to take my name off the list once he began fucking his assistant!

I stepped to the door and took a deep breath, my hand on the knob as I prepared myself. My God, was I sweating? I quickly wiped my brow with the back of my hand and willed myself to put the key in the door. I twisted the knob and suddenly I couldn't move - everything in me wanted to forget about the reason I was there and just leave, to go back to New York and live a lie; "_Elliot loves you, he'd never cheat!" _was the voice I heard in my head. "_Forget about the picture you saw, it isn't what it looks like!"_ "Shut up!" I said out loud to no one and I slowly opened the door and went inside where I was greeted by a familiar song blasting from the stereo in the next room. My frantically beating heart stopped cold in my chest as my apprehension replaced itself with rage! I knew this song very well. Elliot had fucked me senseless so many times to this song during the past five years that my body had developed a Pavlovian response to hearing it. But when I heard her calling God from the bedroom, fucking _my_ husband, to _that_ song, I lost it! Before I could stop myself, I had grabbed a statuette from the desk, ran to the bedroom and clubbed him over his balding head before he even heard me coming!

He fell to the floor as Mairym screamed and I delivered a hard, swift kick to his ribs before I turned on Mairym, reaching for her while she scurried across the huge bed. "YOU BITCH!" Behind me, Elliot had staggered to his feet. I had gotten her pinned to the floor and was beating her senseless as the music continued blasting from the stereo when I felt his arms around my waist.

"Baby, I can explain!" I heard him say as he tried to pull me away from her. I had her hair locked tight in my fist and with my free hand I delivered blow after blow to her face as she screamed, blindly clawing at me but only succeeding in snatching the stereos' power cord from the wall. Elliot finally managed to pull me away - and a patch of her hair came with me. Mairym somehow got on her feet, blood pouring from her nose.

"Did you see that? She attacked me!"

"Mairym, please!"

"You're just gonna stand there and let her get away with - "

"Bitch I will finish you!" I screamed as I lunged at her; Elliot held me back.

"Baby please, calm down!" I broke free and pushed him hard against his chest with both hands.

"GET OFF ME!"

"HELLO? I'm bleeding!" Mairym interjected

"Mairym, what did I say?" he asked her in a scolding tone then turned to me and took my hand in his.

"DO NOT…Touch…Me…Again!" I warned firmly. He let go.

"Baby it's not worth it."

"Not worth it?" _This_ bitch again!

"Mairym, be quiet!" he demanded in a more elevated tone.

"_NOW_ she's not worth it? Was she worth it the first time?"

"Olivia – "

"No, tell me. Why then and not now? What makes her so unworthy now, huh? Could it be the fact that you got caught?" I yelled as I pushed two fingers against his head hard enough to make it jerk backwards. For a quick moment he looked at me with pleading eyes before he hung his head.

"It's not what it looks like." He mumbled almost inaudibly as he looked down at the floor.

"It is EXACTLY what it looks like!" I screamed. The rage inside me was so strong, I felt as if I would morph into a green monster at any moment "Fuck you! We're done!" at this point, I could barely breathe through the tears that were streaming my face and I was shaking. What had just happened here? _Maybe none of this is real. Maybe I'm having a nightmare…_

"So that's it? You're gonna kill what we have, just like that over some bitch who means nothing to me?" I stopped cold.

"…BITCH? Oh hell no…!" I heard Mairym protest. This bimbo didn't know when to shut it!

"Oh my God, Mairym, will you SHUT THE FUCK UP?!" now he was yelling. She got the message this time and quietly took a seat at the end of the bed, a look of defeat and embarrassment shadowing her spirit. I almost felt sorry for her. There was a brief silence as I simply stared quizzically at him.

"Who _are_ you?"

"I thought I was the man you love but you don't seem to care about that anymore!"

"_I_ don't care?" I tried to stay calm but my anger got the better of me and now I was screaming again. "I gave you five years of my life; planned on giving you forever but I walk in here to find you waist-deep in that slut and _I'm_ the one to blame?!"

"That's not what I meant – "

"I don't care what you meant!"

"Olivia – "

"STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!" I turned to leave when I felt his hand on mine…

"Don't leave like this." Suddenly he was closer, pulling me into his arms from behind. I could feel his warm breath on me and I felt my resolve begin to weaken.

"Let go of me."

"I'm sorry. Baby I'm sorry. I'm sorry! I love you please, I'm so sorry!" His hot tears were on my neck. I paused for a brief moment; God, I used to feel so safe in his arms! _You will not forgive him, you will not forgive this! _Everything in me wanted to turn around, to put my arms around him and say that we can get past this; I love him! But yet, I knew in my heart that no matter how much I wanted to romanticize the situation, we were broken and it was with this realization that I steeled myself and swallowed my own tears along with the lump in my throat before pulling away, feeling my heart crack right down the middle as I left his arms.

"We're over!" I said in a voice that did not betray how torn I was. I then walked over to Mairym who was holding a cloth to her bloodied nose, grabbed hold of the diamond engagement and wedding rings on my finger and pulled them off, dropping them into her lap. She dropped the cloth she was holding and looked down at the rings in total disbelief. "Go ahead, He's all yours!" and I walked away without looking back. Once I got out of the suite, I just ran. I ran down 14 flights of stairs and out of the hotel lobby into the street. I don't know how far I ran after that but when I finally stopped, the hotel was nowhere in sight. I was crying Deep, choking sobs, my chest ached like it was about to explode and I couldn't catch my breath. There I was, in the middle of a busy Chicago street, hysterical. I can only imagine what people must have thought but it didn't matter because at that moment all I wanted to do was curl up and die!

* * *

Back in Elliot's hotel suite, he sat motionless on the floor of the bedroom, his head in his hands. He didn't even notice that Mairym was now standing before him.

"Elliot?" she called softly. Without verbally responding, he looked up at her with accusing eyes. She quickly kneeled in front of him. "Are you ok?"

"Am I _ok?_ Are you fuckin' serious?" he asked her with dripping scorn before snatching the rings from her hand. A brief silence followed.

"Is there anything I can – "

"NO!"

"Look I know that you're upset –"

"The love of my life just told me it's over! Why are you still here?"

"I just wanted to make sure that you were ok."

"I'M NOT OK!" he screamed as his tears kept falling.

"Elliot…" there was no time to stop the formation of tears that quickly flooded her eyes but she was determined that she wouldn't cry them.

"Go!" he demanded, leaving no room for argument. Rising to her feet, she started to speak but thought better of it then, just as quickly changed her mind.

"I know that this is the last thing you want to hear right now but I love you Elliot and I'll help you through this, I'll be whatever you need me to be for you, however you need it. All you have to do is let me." She exited the room without another word between them.

* * *

** NIGHTCLUB, DOWNTOWN CHICAGO LATER THAT NIGHT**

**Olivia's POV**

For a while that day I was completely numb. The signs were there. I just chose to ignore them so that I could remain in my blissful bubble. I didn't want to believe, couldn't believe that the man I'd fought so hard for, gave so much of myself to and loved so completely could do something so vile. I could be forgiving of many things but cheating? That was a definite deal breaker! I should have said no when he told he that he'd been hired as personal security for Morgan James and that it required him to be in Chicago for two months while she filmed a movie. Two long months where his assistant, Mairym would be there four days out of every week! But I had no cause to distrust her. I'd known her for four years – since Brian and Elliot first started their security firm. She'd been in my home and we'd established a great rapport, so of course I didn't make a big deal out of it, because at the end of the day, I am not that woman. I don't need the code to his phone or his email password. And I don't care about his facebook account. I don't hover when he's on the phone. If we're out somewhere and he engages himself in conversation with another woman, I don't suddenly feel the need to slink myself around him, marking my territory because I was secure about what we had and knew just what we meant to each other. In retrospect, I think that may have been my biggest mistake; I trusted too much!

I don't know what got into me later, but instead of crying and moping, feeling sorry for myself, that night I told Alex and Casey that I wanted to go out. They couldn't believe it after what I had just gone through but we hit the town anyway. Casey knew all the hottest clubs and tonight, 'AT' was the hot-spot of choice but about an hour after we arrived, my sadness set in all over again.

"I'm sorry I dragged you guys out tonight. I thought I was ready but I guess I was wrong."

"Honey, we get it. You just went through a breakup, its ok. I'll go find Casey and we'll leave." Alex said as she started to get up.

"Nobody has to leave. I'm gonna go to the ladies room."

"We don't mind" Alex protested.

"It's ok. I'll be right back." I left the booth and made my way to the bathroom. A couple minutes later when I was on my way out, the door opened and who walks into the lounge area?

"You have got to be kidding me!" there she was, her face full of the cuts and bruises I'd inflicted upon her back at the hotel. She had done a terrible job at trying to conceal them with makeup, her black eye being the most obvious. I felt bad about what I'd done.

She looked at me with an odd mix of fear and loathing in her eyes. "Stay away from me!"

"You really have no idea how not worth my time you are!" I really did have every intention of leaving but…

"I guess Elliot wasn't either, probably why he was all in _my_ stuff, huh?"

"Elliot is not the first man to fall for a piece of cheap ass and he certainly won't be the last!" I again turned to leave but she was determined…

"Well I guess he preferred cheap ass over a frigid bitch, Bitch!" _Did she just_ – before I could stop myself, I had turned and punched her hard in the face, knocking her into the mirrors, causing them to shatter. I saw her holding her bloodied nose as I left the bathroom but I kept moving. I got back to our booth and Casey was sitting in some guys' lap as he nuzzled her ear.

"Liv, you ok?"

"No. this was a mistake, I'm gonna go."

"Ok, I'll get Alex and"

"No, you guys stay. I could use the time alone."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine."

"Okay. If I don't come home tonight, don't worry, I'm fine."

I walked away and stopped when I got to the entrance. I was so angry! I stood against the brick wall at the end of the hall taking deep breaths to calm myself. After a few minutes I felt like crying. Silently I stood there trying desperately to stop the tears that were now running down my face. I willed them with all of my might to stop but they would not obey. Fine! Crying it is!

"Whatever it is, let it go. You're too beautiful for tears!" I looked up and through my crying eyes saw what had to be an illusion; men like this don't exist anymore! He was tall and broad, and beautiful and sexy – my God he was sexy!

"I must look like a fool!"

"You don't." he assured as he handed me a handkerchief. "You alright?"

"Thank you, I'll be fine."

"I'm Trevor by the way"

"Olivia"

"Nice to meet you Olivia." So, are you coming or going?"

"Going. I was just about to hail a cab."

"I know we don't know each other but I wouldn't be a gentleman if I didn't offer you a ride; I was just leaving and my driver is just across the street…"

"Oh, I couldn't…"

"I promise I won't bite."

Being a New Yorker, I'm usually suspicious of everyone but something about his smile was so genuine that I felt I could trust him. There was something familiar about him, and I decided that if he was a maniac, being killed would definitely stop this ache in my heart.

"Thank you."

"Is that a yes?"

"Yes."

* * *

**CASEY'S APARTMENT**

Before I had a chance to change my mind, I was in his car on my way back to the Casey's apartment, and to my surprise, I enjoyed his company. We talked the whole ride there and by the time we arrived I was actually smiling! He got out of the car and came around to open my door for me, offering his hand to help me out. We stood there for a brief moment just looking at each other before I spoke.

"It was really a pleasure meeting you tonight."

"The pleasure was all mine." And he kissed my hand. GOD, that sent shivers through me! And it was off that shivery high that I proposed: "Would you like to come up…for coffee? It's the least I could do. You know, as a thank you." he paused a moment before answering

"I think I'd love to come up – for coffee."

I don't know what got into me but 5 minutes after we got up to the apartment, we were all over each other. He had already pulled my panties off and had my nipple in his mouth. DEAR GOD, his tongue felt amazing!

"PLEASE tell me you have condoms!" I breathed into his mouth minutes later as we kissed. I was so ready.

"Not on me! I don't usually…"

"wait!" I loved Casey dearly but she was a bit of a good-time-girl. There had to be condoms here, lots of them! From where I was lying on the sofa, I reached above my head to the end table, opened the drawer and blindly felt inside; BINGO! I can't remember the last time I'd been so grateful for anything!

I admit; I was a total slut! Do I regret it? No! That man fucked me thoroughly and I came like a waterfall over and over again! I woke up the next morning to a note on the pillow next to me.

"_Olivia,_

_ I thought it would be best if I weren't here when your friends got back. _

_ Here's my number, please use it; I would love to see you again!_

_ Trevor"_

I smiled, images of last night flashing through my head. God, everything about him felt so good! I couldn't help but wish that I had stayed at a hotel, then I could have gotten another taste of him this morning – hell, maybe all day. My thoughts of debauchery were quickly interrupted with a knock on the door. I shoved the note under the pillow just before it opened and Casey and Alex walked in.

"You're finally awake!" Casey observed as she plopped down on the bed.

"I guess."

"Were you ok here by yourself last night?" Alex sat beside me, putting her arm around me.

"I managed."

"What hit this room?" Casey asked as she picked something up from the floor. "It's a mess!"

"I – thought I lost something and I went a little overboard looking for it I guess."

"I guess. So, we have ten hours left before we leave Chicago. How about we go see the city, try again for some fun?" Alex was such a tourist!

"Or we could just hang out here if she's not up to it." Casey chimed in.

"Guys, I'm fine. And that sounds great; we should do a little sight-seeing before we go."

"Good, shopping first!" Alex called, excited.

Casey sighed. "You really should curb your obsession with buying things, you know?"

"I will…when I'm dead!"

"Well I'm gonna need time to get myself together so I'll meet up with you guys."

"Suit yourself!" Casey said as she got up from the bed. "Let's go big spender!" Alex kissed my cheek before following Casey out of the room. I let out a huge sigh before reaching under the pillow to retrieve the note, reading it again and wondering if it would be best to let a one night stand be just one night. I decided to hold on to it until my mind was made up.

A half hour later after a nice, hot shower I went to the night table to grab my phone and there was the note. I stared at it for a moment before picking it up. _Why am I holding on to this?_ I sat on the bed and read it again – just thinking about the way he touched me last night was enough to get me pulsating down there – I wanted another taste of him so bad! I took a deep breath before dialing the number. He answered on the first ring.

"Hello?" That voice! I was starting to feel better already.

"Trevor, hi. Its – "

"Olivia?" his voice suddenly perked up. "I was hoping you'd call."

"I…wanted to thank you for last night; it was just what I needed."

"I think it was what we both needed. I have to admit, as much as I hoped I would, I didn't think I'd hear from you again." His voice was so damn sexy!

"The truth is, I'm leaving today and I'd like to see you again if y-"

"When and where?."

"Here. Now."

"What about your friends?"

"They're out shopping so we have all day."

"I'll be there in ten minutes!" and he disconnected the call. I quickly called Casey and gave an excuse about wanting to be alone. It was about five minutes later when the doorbell rang. _It's him!_ I thought as I went to answer it. Imagine my shock when I opened the door to find Elliot standing on the other side. I slammed it in his face without as much as a second thought. _SHIT!_

"I just wanna talk."

"We have nothing to say to each other."

"Olivia please…"

"Would you just leave me alone?"

"I'll stand out here all day if that's what it takes!" there was a short silence. "I mean it Olivia!" I took a long pause before I reluctantly opened the door. He walked right in.

"Why are you doing this?"

"I'm just trying to – "

"Just trying to what? Do you think that showing up here and harassing me is going to help fix things?"

"I didn't say – "

"It's not enough that you stabbed me in the heart but you keep twisting the damn knife! I don't want to see you, Elliot. I don't want to talk to you. I don't even want to think about you! You made your choice when you let her in!"

"Olivia I love you!"

"AND I TRUSTED YOU! I trusted you and you broke us!" we were both in tears at his point.

"I'll fix it! I swear I'll fix it, just give me a chance!"

"There's nothing to fix."

"We love each other!"

"And what's love without trust?"

"I'll get it back; starting right now!" he dropped to his knees in front of me, grabbing onto my dress. "You want me to quit and come home? Done! I'll do anything you want just please don't leave me!" His head was buried in my stomach, and he was sobbing; his tears soaking my dress as he clung to me desperately.

"I'm already gone!" I stepped away, turning my back to him.

"Baby please! Please. I'll never – "

"Goodbye Elliot!" after a moment, he finally got up and left. The second I heard the door close, I sank onto the sofa and broke into sobs. A few minutes later, there was a knock at the door. _Is he serious? _I just knew it was Elliot again, coming back to further torment me. Angrily, I got up and marched to the door, flinging it open but instead of the asshole, it was Trevor standing there. There was a brief silence as our eyes met, locked and held each others' gazes.

"Have you been crying?" he asked as he walked inside.

"It's not important."

"Of course it is."

"No. what's important is your ability to make me forget." I nuzzled at his neck. "Can you make me forget?" his mouth was now dangerously close to mine.

"I'll see what I can do!" he said before kissing me hard and deep. Within seconds he'd scooped me up in his arms, my legs wrapped around his waist as he carried me to the bedroom.

Let me pause for a moment. When I woke up this morning with that huge grin on my face, I wondered if maybe I'd exaggerated in my mind how good the sex had been the night before – take heartache, loneliness and throw in the fact that it had been 2 months since I'd had some, hell even a crumb would taste like a gourmet meal if you were starving! Maybe it hadn't been as great as I remembered. Maybe….oh God...OH MY GOD! I spent the next few hours being pleasured beyond belief and for those few hours, he absolutely succeeded in making me forget every single care I had in the world. I let go of everything except him, me and our bodies!

After, I just lay there in his arms, sated beyond belief and reveling in the sound of us breathing.

"Stay."

"What?"

"Stay. Here, with me." I propped myself up on my elbow to look at him.

"What are you saying?"

"I'm saying that I feel…something that I've never felt before and I'm not ready to let it go."

"Trevor…I just ended a relationship; I have a life to get back to in New York."

"I know. It was stupid of me…"

"It wasn't stupid. It was sweet." I let my fingers run over the stubble on his face as I looked at him. The truth was, I felt something too; I wasn't sure what it was but it was there and it was more than just physical. "Maybe we should just make the most of the time we have left." He tucked a loose lock of hair behind my ear.

"You're beautiful, you know that?" I quickly pushed back the tears that threatened to flood my eyes and leaned in to kiss him. He ran his hands through my hair while his tongue slipped between my lips and we explored each others' mouths before he turned over, putting me on my back and nestling himself between my legs, we had more amazing sex, only this time it was different; it was tender and sweet, like making love!

* * *

Later, we stood at the door to Casey's apartment as he prepared to leave…

"I guess this is goodbye, huh?"

"I guess it is."

"Well, you have a safe flight and…take care." I could tell that he was struggling.

"I will. You do the same; not the flight part. " I felt so nervous inside. He laughed.

"If you're ever back in Chicago…" he leaned in and kissed me sweetly on the cheek, lingering there for a moment. "Goodbye Olivia."

"Goodbye Trevor." He turned and walked away and as I closed the door, a feeling of sadness suddenly came over me that I couldn't explain but I shook it off. I was on my way to the bedroom when I was startled by someone knocking frantically on the door. I had barely gotten it open before Trevor took me in his arms, pulled me tight against his body and kissed me with more passion that I'd ever been kissed before. There was fire in that kiss and it burned through every fiber of my being! When he finally released me I stood speechless, motionless, yet every inch of me in flames!

"If only I'd met you first." He said then he turned and left, just like that, the door slamming behind him, leaving my mind in a daze and my body screaming for more of him!

* * *

On the way home, we sat there on the plane, me lost in thought for most of the ride while Casey and Alex blabbed on about god-knows-what.

"Hello? Earth to Olivia!" I snapped out of my daze to see Casey waving a hand in front of me. She had a few days off and decided to fly back to New York with Alex and me.

"I'm sorry, did you say something?"

"Okay, what's up with you?" Alex asked?

"Nothing."

"Can I ask a personal question" Casey again

"Shoot."

"Did you sleep with Elliot after…?"

"God, no!"

"Swear it?"

"On my life!"

"Then who was he?"

"Who was who?"

"Mr. Rebound sex…and before you deny it, allow me to introduce the evidence…" _evidence? What evi-_ before I could say anything, she pulled a condom wrapper from her purse and waved it in front of me. I swallowed hard.

"W-Where did you get that?"

"Your bedroom floor, not to mention there were quite a few of them in the trash – along with their very used contents. So if it wasn't Elliot…"

I hung my head. "Yes, ok? But it wasn't rebound sex." Alex looked on amazed.

"Then what do you call it?"

"Who cares what she calls it" Alex interjected, "how was it?" I paused for a moment, still embarrassed and not wanting to discuss it but I had to share, it was too good to keep to myself.

"It was…amazing… incredible; It was the best sex I've ever had!" they ate it up, squealing gleefully like gossip-starved little piggies. "…and that is all I will say on the matter"

"Like hell!" Casey protested, "You cannot use that many adjectives to describe how good it was and then shut up about it, you have to give us details!"

"No, actually I don't."

"Why the secrecy?"

"I'm not being secretive, I'm being private!"

"I think somebody's in like."

"and denial"

"What? I don't even know his last name and besides, I just ended a relationship, I don't feel anything for anyone right now; except blind hatred for Elliot!"

"So that's it? You never see him again?" I simply shrugged my shoulders and turned my head to face the window.

**So there you have it. Should I continue? Please review and let me know.**


	2. Back to Benson

**IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME COMING FOR THIS UPDATE. COULDN'T DECIDE IF I ACTUALLY WANTED TO CONTINUE WITH THIS STORY, BUT I'VE GOTTEN SO MUCH POSITIVE FEEDBACK, I DECIDED THAT I HAD TO. THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH FOR EMBRACING THIS STORY. HERE'S PART 2, DEDICATED TO ****Iwannahamberger2** **WHO TOLD ME IN COMMENTS: "****You will fucking continue this story dangit!" LMAO! WELL, IT HAS BEEN FUCKING CONTINUED! ENJOY!**

* * *

**ELLIOT'S HOTEL. DOWNTOWN CHICAGO**

Filming was done for the day and Elliot sat quietly in his hotel room contemplating the events of the last couple days. _How could I have been so fucking stupid? _He thought to himself as he drank his fourth beer of the night. A moment of weakness and he'd lost everything! He didn't love Mairym, she was a willing body when he was horny and without his wife; a means to an end. It had simply gotten out of control and he'd allowed it to go further than he'd meant to.

_They'd been in Chicago for a month and he was already over it! It had been 32 days since he'd been with his wife and it was driving him insane! She was all he could think about! He and Olivia had a very physical relationship; the sex was insane and had only gotten better over time. He'd never gone more than a few days without being inside her since the first time she'd given herself to him, but of course, this was the first time since starting the company with Brian that he's ever had to be stationed out of town for this long with no contact. He usually only assigned himself to the jobs that kept him in the city, and when he did leave town, either she would make trips to join him on her days off or he would rotate his schedule by leaving another team member in his place so that he could travel home to her. This job however, he had been personally requested by Morgan James herself to be her personal detail for the duration of this shoot! She'd heard that he was the best and that was what she wanted. But this was too much! This was killing him! He needed his wife but with the extremely sensitive case they were investigating, her workload hadn't allowed her to leave the city for even a day and so here he was, stuck, sexually frustrated and going out of his mind! _

_It had been a long day of filming and when it was over, all he'd wanted was to retreat to his suite and relax. He'd just showered and gotten into a pair o sweats and a tee shirt when there was a knock at the door. He'd gotten up to open it to find his assistant standing there. _

"_Mairym, it's late."_

"_I know, and I'm sorry." She said, letting herself in. "But you still haven't gotten these contracts signed and they have to be sent out first thing tomorrow morning!" he sighed._

"_Alright!" he said and walked over to the sofa to sit down where she'd already parked herself and had spread the contracts out on the coffee table._

"_your lawyer says everything is in order, so all we need is your Han…cock" she said seductively and handed him a pen. He looked over at her as he took it from her hand and couldn't help but notice how scantily she was dressed. She had to know that coming into her boss's suite in nothing but short shorts and a tank top with no bra was inappropriate, right? He made a mental note to talk to her about it in the morning but right now, he just wanted to get her out of his suite as quick as possible because he could feel his body starting to react to what was displayed in front of him._

"_Where do I sign?"_

"_there." She pointed to the contract closest to her, he quickly put his signature on it. "there." She pointed out the spot that required signing on the one that was between them. he signed it. "just one more…" she reached across his lap for the contract that she'd purposely placed so far away from herself and when she did, her breast practically spilled out of her tank top, her nipples brushing against his thigh. _

"_Mairym…"_

"_Opps, sorry. These things seem to have a mind of their own!" she said as she pressed a hand to her bosom. "right on that line…" she said. While he was guilty of looking and had to admit to himself that they were nice, they had NOTHING on Olivia's, he thought as he signed the last contract. As far as he was concerned, Olivia had the most perfect breasts he'd ever seen. _

"_All done!" he said as he gathered the papers and handed them to Mairym. _

"_Elliot, I… I know that being separated from Olivia for so long has been difficult for you…physically."_

"_What?"_

"_It's just… well, I know that a man like you has certain needs that when they aren't met can be… frustrating." She said as her hand rubbed his thigh._

"_What the hell are you doing?" _

"_Just letting you know that if you if you wanna exercise those needs, I can be perfectly discreet!" she said seductively as her hand travelled further up his thigh until it was at his crotch. He shouldn't have been, but right now he was so turned on. She was basically offering to be his fuck toy with no strings attached. No, he knew that he had to stop it before it went any further._

"_Trust me, you don't wanna play this game!"_

"_I'm a big girl." She looked him dead in the eye. "I can take it!" Jesus, that went straight to his dick!_

"_You need to leave. Do it now and you get to keep your job!"_

"_or, you can let me stay and fuck me like you know you want to!"_

_He made the wrong choice! _

_He had no idea how it happened, but it happened fast. He's not sure how he got up from the sofa, or who initiated contact and he's not sure how those tiny little shorts she was wearing ended up around her ankles. What he is sure of is that right here, right now, in this elegantly decorated hotel suite, he has his assistant bent over the back of a sofa, her legs spread grotesquely wide and he is fucking her senseless with sheer, brute force! There is nothing romantic or gentle about this coupling, there was no kissing or foreplay involved. He has a wad of her blonde hair tightly entangled in one fist, while the other is holding tight to the back of the tank top she's wearing. She cannot move from the position in which he has her; exactly as he'd intended. Her breasts have completely spilled out from her top, but he doesn't care about her breasts or any other part of her except the part that he is mercilessly driving himself into again and again. _

_She didn't expect that he would be this intense. She'd fantasized about what it would be like to be with her boss but this…she wasn't expecting this, it felt as if he were literally splitting her apart!_

_He continued pounding her ruthlessly and gave no care to her pleasure; his only concern was his own release and he was finding it hard to achieve with her screaming bloody murder! He released his hold on her shirt and clamped his hand over her mouth, then closed his eyes and imagined himself inside of Olivia, hearing her soft, sensual moans... before he knew it, he felt himself coming and with one final thrust that completely bottomed out and hurt so bad that she bit down on her lip hard enough to draw blood, he spilled deep inside of his assistant then quickly released his grip on her and pulled out, pulling up his pants just as quickly. _

"_My wife's gonna be calling soon!" He said as he walked off. "You don't need to be here she does." And he continued to his bedroom and shut the door. She couldn't move. She stayed there slumped over the back of the couch as the breath slowly came back into her body, his semen leaking from her and her insides throbbing painfully from the fucking she'd just endured and she smiled. In her mind, this was the beginning of something real._

He felt hot tears sliding down his cheek, tears of deep regret because he'd known that he'd ruined the best thing he ever had and he didn't know how to fix it. it had been a week since he'd been caught; a weeks since he saw the devastation he'd cause the only woman he'd ever truly loved; the woman he'd sworn before God to love and honor and he broke her heart! She said that she never wanted to see him again, but he wouldn't give up, he would make this right with her if it took the rest of his life!

He stared at the phone and decided that maybe he should try calling her. The shoot had wrapped so this would be his last day in Chicago and he couldn't wait to get back to New York so that he could begin trying to regain her trust and earn her love and respect again. he knew that it would be hard but he was willing to do whatever it took. Brian told him that she'd gotten rid of his things and had changed the locks; it was going to be hard, but he was ready. Olivia and his marriage meant everything to him and he would not let either go without a fight!

_I should definitely call her_, he thought to himself and picked up his phone to do just that, however, before he could dial, it began ringing in his hand. He hadn't bothered to look at the ID before answering.

"Stabler."

"I've been trying to call you." _Damn! _He made a mental note to screen his calls more carefully.

"Mairym, this isn't a good idea."

"Why?"

"You know why. I love my wife."

"Always Olivia!"

"What? What do you mean _always Olivia_? It's always _been _Olivia; you knew that!" of course she knew that, but knowing did nothing to stop the words from hitting her hard in the gut.

"of course I knew that, but it didn't stop me from falling in love with you." He shook his head.

"Mairym, you don't love me. and, once we've put gotten some space between us, you'll realize it."

"Space?"

"What we did, it should never have happened. My wife got hurt because of it and I have to make things right with her."

"You blame me for this."

"I blame ME for this! I betrayed my wife, I hurt her deeply. You were just… available." She couldn't stop the tears in her eyes from forming.

"Is that all I was to you… _available_?" she asked, trying to keep the tears at bay.

"Mairym…"

"You know what? Don't! Go back to her; beg her, plead with her to take you back! But, while you're on your knees groveling for her forgiveness, you might wanna keep in mind, the other mess you've made!"

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"I'm pregnant…and it's yours!"

* * *

**SQUAD ROOM OF THE 1-6 **

**Olivia's POV.**

A month had passed since the Chicago incident and since then, I had been using two very effective ways to deal with it – work and partying! When I wasn't putting in 16 - 20 hour days at the precinct I was in the clubs every night till six in the morning – no real balance, just anything to keep me busy and my mind off of the mess everything had become. The first thing I did when I got back to New York was to rid my home of everything that belonged to Elliot. He's lucky he has a friend like Brian who didn't hesitate to come and get everything and put it in storage for him until he got back. I had also met with a divorce attorney to see what my options were, but I left it at that for the time being. As for my lying, cheating husband, I hadn't talked to the bastard since that morning in Casey's apartment, which suited me just fine! He's been calling non-stop but I've ignored every call and erased every message. Hearing his voice only made it worse and I really didn't need that right now; he needs to realize that there was no going back from this. It was what it was, and what it was, was over!

This morning, I had finally taken the next step and given my lawyer the go-ahead to file, instructing him that I didn't want anything from Elliot, just my freedom. Like any divorce attorney, he looked at me as if I had lost my mind.

"Mrs. Stabler – "

"That's another thing, I'll be going back to Benson."

"Ms. Benson, you do realize that your husband has a very lucrative business; considering the circumstances under which the marriage is ending, I would have no problem getting you a very large settlement as well as very hefty alimony payments."

"That's not what this is about. He leaves with what's his, I keep what's mine." He opened his mouth to speak again but I cut him off. "and that is ALL I am looking for!"

I had gone over it in my head from every angle and there was no scenario in which I could see myself being able to get past this. I loved Elliot, he was the biggest part of my heart even still, and if I could have found a way to live with it, I swear, I would have, but the hurt was just too great!

To compound my problems, I couldn't stop thinking about Trevor! I knew that it was too soon to be thinking about another man, after all, I was still reeling from losing Elliot but Trevor made a huge impression on me; one way bigger than the incredible sex we had. Day after day I literally had to fight the urge to call him. I wanted to see him, I wanted to get to know him, to touch him again and feel those strong hands all over my – it's too soon! I knew that part of me wanting him so bad was me needing to move on from Elliot and I refused to be_ that_ girl – the rebounder. Still, I couldn't forget the way Trevor looked at me that last time; the way he kissed me… _Olivia, snap out of it!_

I was at my desk and had just finished up my fives. 9:30, I should have left an hour ago! Nick and I were the only two still here and he was preparing to leave.

"Still workin, Liv?"

"Actually, I was just finishing up. You headed home?"

"No…um, Cassie's, we're having a late dinner." He said, a smile on his face. Cassie was Nick's girlfriend. They'd been seeing each other for about six months. I'd gotten the chance to meet her when he first thought that he might be serious about her. He wanted to know what I thought of her, so he'd staged a dinner at his place and invited El and me. By the end of the night, I really liked her and told Nick that I thought she was definitely a keeper. I guess my opinion held a lot of weight, because 4 months after that night, they're still together and she and I have actually become good friends.

"I didn't think you'd ever smile like that again after Maria, I'm glad you found someone that makes you happy."

"Thanks." He said and paused for a moment. "Hey Liv… I know how hard this is but trust me, it gets easier. In the meantime, if you need to talk, I'm here for you." I felt tears sting my eyes.

"Thanks partner." I answered, just above a whisper as I wiped the corner of my right eye before the tear could escape. He put a hand on my shoulder.

"Anytime. Goodnight Liv."

"Goodnight Nick." He walked away from my desk, towards the doors but then stopped, and turned his head to face me…

"And Liv?"

"Yeah?"

"You'll smile again, too." Silent tears immediately fell down my face and I nodded, too overcome with emotion to speak." "I'll see you tomorrow." He said and went on his way. _Did I really just cry in front of my partner? _I asked myself as I got up from my desk, needing to put some water on my face.

15 minutes later I was all packed up and was on my way home for the night when my phone rang.

"Hey, Alex!"

"Where are you?"

"Just leaving work."

"Go straight home, I'll meet you there."

"Ok…what's?"

"See you in a few." And she hung up. One thing about Alex, she really knew how to pique one's interest. Once outside, I quickly hailed a cab and headed home.

* * *

**OLIVIA'S HOME. UPPER WEST SIDE.**

I got to my townhouse and Alex was already waiting inside.

"Ok, what was so important that I had to rush home?" I asked as I put my things down by the door.

"Come. Sit." She said as she patted the spot on the sofa next to her. She had this look about her that made me uneasy. Bad news was coming. "Have you talked to Elliot at all lately?"

"Are you serious?" She was. "No. Not for lack of him trying, but, no."

"Maybe you should have."

"What? Are you feeling ok?" I couldn't believe she was suggesting such a thing. As if I would have _anything _to say to that man!

"Olivia I'm serious."

"Ok, what's going on?"

"I know why Elliot's been calling you."

"Obviously"

"That too, but it's become more than that.

"You wanna share?"

"He's been trying to tell you something." She was really dragging this out. "He wanted you to hear it from him first."

"Hear what? Alex spit it out, you're killing me here!"

"Elliot proposed to Mairym last month!"

You know that loud tone that they sound when they test the emergency broadcast system? That was the sound inside of my head at the moment. It were as if my processors had shut down completely. As I began to regain my senses, I saw Alex still talking to me but no words were yet audible. I was staring at her as if she were new and strange to me when my ears suddenly came back. "Olivia? Hello?"

"What did you say?" I was trying so hard to appear unfazed.

"Elliot and Mairym…"

"I heard you! I just – how do you know this?"

"Brian. Elliot told him three weeks ago when he got back. Brian told me today. Since Elliot couldn't reach you, Brian thought it would be best if I were the one to tell you before you found out."

"Last month? He proposed to her last month? When?"

"The week after you found them together."

"There has to be more to this, what else did Brian say?"

"Olivia -"

"I need to know!" There was a long silence before Alex finally spoke.

"He asked her to marry him because she's pregnant!"

How many times can someone be completely shocked and dismayed in the span of three minutes? Apparently, two.

"No…that's…he…"

"Liv, I'm so sorry."

"Why? You're not the one who lied, and cheated, and got your side piece pregnant!"

"Are you -?"

"Just when I managed to put some of me back together… We were talking about starting a family, I even went off the pill. I was gonna be the one to…" My tears began flowing in torrents. "How could he do…?" Alex was at a loss for words so she did the only thing she could have done at that moment; she took me in her arms and she held me while I cried and she cried too. Then, after a long moment…

"Aww, honey. Do you need a drink?" She offered, still in tears.

"Yes please." I replied through my sobs.

Later, Alex and I sat on my living room floor after we'd finished off a bottle of wine and were now doing shots of Stoli Elit. Suffice it to say, we were feeling no pain.

"I'll tell you something…" I was drunk out of my mind and my speech was now horribly slurred. "I'm done! He can have Mairym. Fuck em both!"

"I think it-it's I think it's about time" Alex said as she shakily raised the shot glass to her lips. I don't know which of us was drunker at this point.

"you didn't let me finish. 'Cause from this as from right now Idon't give a fuck! Idontgiveafuck! SO, fuck him, fuck her, just fuck it! Fuck it, fuck it, fuck it!

"Fuck it!" she agreed before she passed out. I guess she was drunker! …Just as I got up to get a blanket for her… "We should go out!" She exclaimed as she rose up, scaring me half to death!

So there we were the two of us, drunk off our asses but not caring. We went to Hashtag and danced till three in the morning and got even drunker before going back to my place and crashing in my bed fully clothed. Later that morning while stirring from my stupor I rolled and went over the edge of the bed, making a loud thud as my body hit the hardwood floor.

"Ow." I just lay there for a moment before I slowly pulled myself up in time to see Alex cradling her head in her hands.

"What. The. Hell?" she exclaimed, eyes still closed.

"The floor hit me." I said as I crawled back into bed.

"How much did we drink last night?" she asked, eyes still closed.

"Too much." Suddenly, the alcohol began talking back and my stomach turned. "I feel sick!" I cried as I ran to the bathroom, my hand covering my mouth.

"Amateur!" Alex said as I made a run for it. I got to the toilet without a second to spare before the vomit erupted from my mouth in violent bursts. After hugging the toilet bowl for another ten minutes, I crawled my way to the shower and got in, still in my clothes and hit the cold water. The shock of the cold woke me right up and I sat there for a few minutes before I stood and removed my clothes, and turned on the hot water. After I was done washing my hair and body, I hit the cold again for a rinse and stepped out feeling much better, wrapping myself in a big, fluffy towel before going back to my bedroom to get dressed for court. I left just after nine with Alex still asleep in my bed. on the cab ride to the courthouse, my mind began to wander and I cursed myself for letting this happen to my marriage.

_If I hadn't been so selfish and had just gone to him, he never would have turned to her… _I immediately pushed the thought from my mind. Then I thought about the night Casey had called to tell me that she was in a restaurant watching Elliot in a corner booth with a gap-toothed blonde and that they looked very…cozy. Hearing that my husband, the man who I loved more than life was cheating on me was bad enough, but hearing it from my best friend was downright humiliating! _Why am I being tortured with all of this on top of my hangover?_ I thought as I pushed that memory away as well

Then somehow, Trevor crept into my thoughts and I thought of his kiss. His hot, sweet, fiery kiss and I sighed.

_If only I'd met you first!_

Those words were burned into my brain. What if he had? What if all those years ago, it had been him instead of Elliot? What if he had been the one I'd given my heart to? The one I'd married, would I be sitting here, right now with my heart torn in pieces? I pushed those thoughts from my mind as well. I barely knew Trevor and I was sure that I would never see him again. he'd remain in my mind as nothing more than a pleasant memory…the problem with that was, it had been more than just my mind that he'd worked his way into.

* * *

**So what do we think? do we like it? do we hate it? do we want more? All you gotta do is hit that review button and make your opinions known, Again, I welcome all feedback, even if it's negative, just keep it respectful!**


	3. Happenstance

**I'M REALLY SORRY FOR TAKING A MONTH TO UPDATE THIS FIC. THANKS FOR THE LOVELY REVIEWS. I'M GLAD THAT YOU GUYS LIKE IT. CHAPTER THREE IS A BIT SHORTER THAN THE PREVIOUS TWO, BUT IT DIDN'T NEED ANYTHING ELSE AND I REFUSE TO FORCE WHAT DOESN'T FIT. ANYWAY, ENOUGH OF MY RAMBLING; HERE IT IS, CHAPTER THREE. ENJOY!**

* * *

**.**

**OLIVIA'S TOWNHOUSE. UPPER WEST SIDE MANHATTAN**

**Olivia's POV**

The month that followed was non-stop work. I couldn't allow myself one idle moment or I would have completely broken down. Between the whole mess with Elliot and not being able to stop thinking about Trevor, my mind was in one big, constant state of confusion! The time off that I'd requested had finally come through and by this time tomorrow, I'd be on my way to L.A. for some much-needed relaxation. And just maybe, I'd be able to figure things out and know what my next move should be.

"Talk to me. Are you really ok?" Alex asked as we went through my bedroom closets. I'd been particularly quiet since receiving the news about Elliot and his…_her_ and Alex was worried.

"I um… I will be. I just… it's hard."

"I know. Hey why don't you come for dinner tonight? My mom should be landing in a couple of hours and I'm sure she would love to see you."

"I would love to see her too but I have so much to do before I leave tomorrow. Plus, you two haven't seen each other in months, I don't want to intrude."

"You wouldn't be."

"I'd feel like it. Besides, I don't think I'd be very good company." I said as I returned 2 shoes boxes to the shelf. There was another brief silence before I felt Alex wrap her arms around me from behind. I rested my head against her and sighed just before a tear escaped my eye and rolled down my cheek.

"I know he's my fiancé's best friend but, if you wanna kick his ass, I'm down." I laughed and just as quickly was overcome with tears and began to weep while my Alex held me. I couldn't wait to get away from here.

* * *

**.**

**ELLIOT'S OFFICE. LOWER MANHATTAN**

"So that's it? You're really gonna go through with this?" Brian asked as he sat on the edge of Elliot's desk, putting his lollipop back in his mouth.

"I don't really have a choice now do I?" Brian's face contorted into a disbelieving scowl and he took the candy from his mouth again.

"What do you mean you don't have a choice? You fight for your marriage; that's your choice!"

"I've tried fighting for my marriage, she doesn't want anything to do with me!"

"If you believe that, you're an even bigger idiot than you were when you cheated! Dude, you can't marry Mairym, what the hell are you doin?!" The office suddenly grew quiet. "El?"

"She served me divorce papers." Brian's heart broke for his friend.

"I'm sorry man… I didn't know… but it doesn't mean…"

"It's exactly what it means…she wants her freedom. I gotta give it to her."

"El…fight for her."

"You still think after everything that's happened, she could love me again?"

"I don't think she ever stopped." Brian said and walked out of the office. Elliot spun around in his chair, staring out the window.

_I, Olivia, take you Elliot to be my husband…_

He thought back to their wedding day. She was so beautiful standing there at the altar in her flowing white gown. They promised their lives to each other that day; promised their hearts, their fidelity, their trust and he threw it all away. Everything was a mess and now he was having a child with a woman that he couldn't care less for even if he tried.

He turned his chair to face his desk and took the divorce papers from his drawer, staring at them in his hand like he has every day since he was served. He's been holding on to them for weeks and he knows that it's not fair to Olivia, but he just can't bring himself to sign them because to do so would mean admitting that he's lost her for good, and he's just not ready to face that reality. Yet, thinking of life without her frightens him; not waking up to her smile, or being unable to hold her in his arms or hear her voice every day; feel her body against his while they make love… these things are more essential to him than breathing and right now, he felt as if her had no air. His eyes were now wet with tears, a single one escaping and making its way down his face and falling onto the document in his hand. he tossed the papers onto his desk and hung his head, sobbing.

Out by the receptionist area, Brian was waiting for an elevator. He was on his way to meet with a client, his lollipop still in his mouth when one of the cars arrived and opened. H was not happy to see Mairym step out.

"Jesus, can I have a drink first?" He mumbled his disdain at seeing the woman.

"Hello to you too Brian." She replied haughtily.

"That's Mr. Cassidy, only people I _like_ call me Brian." She gave an annoyed smirk as he stepped between the elevator doors.

"Is Elliot in?"

"You mean you don't have a tracking device implanted somewhere on him?" she shook her head, obviously annoyed with his antics.

"I'll find him myself! Thanks for nothing!" she fumed as he stood against the back wall of the elevator.

"bitch." he breathed out incredulously. He couldn't believe Elliot had ever gotten involved with someone like her.

"I heard that!"

"I meant you to." He said calmly and put his candy back in his mouth, a smile on his face as the doors closed.

* * *

**.**

**LOS ANGELES**

**Olivia's POV**

The morning I arrived in Los Angeles, I went straight to my hotel, put the 'Do Not Disturb' sign on the door, turned off very device I owned and slept! When I woke up, it was 6:30 and I was starving! Rather than order room service, I decided that I'd rather dine out and headed to the bathroom for a shower before getting dressed.

It was almost 8pm when I arrived downstairs at the hotel restaurant, deciding that I wasn't up for going out after all. Besides, I'd splurged on a fancy hotel that housed a five-star restaurant. I'd have dinner here tonight and promised myself that I would get out and see the city starting tomorrow.

* * *

**.**

**TREVOR**

He had just wrapped up his final meeting of the day and headed back to his hotel, thankful that he could finally unwind. These last couple months had been stressful. His firm had put him in charge of overseeing the merger of two giant corporations after months of maneuvering, tonight, they'd finally dotted the last 'i' and crossed the last 't'. he decided on having a drink to celebrate before going up to his suite and headed to the hotel bar.

"Macallan, straight. He ordered as he took a seat at the bar and let out a deep sigh, as a familiar thought ran through his head; _Her. _She was all he could think about since meeting her two months ago. Olivia. She was the most beautiful woman he'd ever laid eyes on; everything about her, her hair, her smile, her eyes... those eyes haunted his dreams every night and his thoughts every day. He still remembered exactly how she felt in his arms; her skin was like fine silk. He thought about the way she'd looked at him when he was inside her; the way she'd moaned…

"Stop it Trevor." He said to himself as the bartended put his drink in front of him. he knew he needed to forget her but he couldn't; it was like she'd cast a spell on him and no matter what he did, he couldn't break it. Hell, if he was being honest with himself, he didn't want to. He liked the way thinking about her made him feel. It gave him hope that maybe one day, he would see her again; maybe have a chance to be more to her than just a fling, even though to him it had been so much more than that. He took a sip from his glass, feeling the warmth of the liquid as it went down and returned it to its place on the bar, absently stirring the liquid with his forefinger. He'd fallen for her – hard! And he knew that it was crazy but he had no other way to describe it; they'd made a connection. He wanted her from the moment he kissed her. Those beautiful lips hadn't just taken his kiss; they'd grabbed his heart and he was done for.

Still, he knew that he couldn't push her. As much as he'd hoped and prayed that she would decide to pick up the phone and call him, it never happened, but as the weeks turned into months, he still kept faith. He laughed, taking another sip from his glass. Here he was, a 40 year old educated, successful, and pretty good looking guy; he had the world at his feet but had been reduced to anxiously waiting for the day when his phone would ring and it would be her on the other end. He could have any woman he wanted and he's had more than his share but he hadn't even looked at another since Olivia! Maybe he was being stupid. Maybe it was time to let go. He barely knew her and she was obviously not interested in ever seeing him again or she would have called… all she had to do was call; give him a word and he would drop everything to go to her anywhere. She had that much power over him and probably hadn't given him a second thought since that night.

"You suck, Langan!" he said aloud to himself as he raised his glass and in one gulp, swallowed the remainder of the whiskey inside, then signed his bill and walked out. He had gone ten feet when he realized that he'd left his very expensive Mont Blanc pen on the bar and went back inside to retrieve it. He was just putting it back inside his jacket when his heart stopped. It couldn't be! There, across the room, she sat alone. _My god! She's even more beautiful than I remember! _He thought to himself. She took his breath away. He watched her as she signed her dining check then stood up to leave. She was wearing a little black dress that hugged every one of her amazing curves perfectly and her hair fell softly around her shoulders in beautiful, soft curls. She was a vision to behold and he smiled; knowing in that instant that this was a sign. She picked up her purse and that's when he willed his feet to move from where they'd cemented themselves to the floor and he began walking toward her, not even sure what he would say once he reached her; what if she didn't even remember him? He didn't care. The only thing that mattered was that he got to her before she was gone. 20 feet…. 15 feet…. He was taking quick strides. 8 feet… he couldn't remember the last time he'd been as determined as he was at this very moment. 3 feet away and before he could say a word, she looked up from her phone and…

"Trevor?" she said, a beautiful smile suddenly plastered on her face; she couldn't belive he was standing here in front of her. The relief he felt inside caused his eyes to glisten.

"Olivia!" her name fell from his lips with reverence, as if it were sacred. And, there they stood, without words, staring at each other. He looked into her eyes and he was trapped in them all over again. It was as if he were being guided by a divine force when he reached out and caressed her beautiful face, letting his hand move to the back of her neck then pulling her slowly into him and leaning in to her, their lips meeting for an intense, passionate kiss as he cupped her face with both hands and their tongues met. Right there in a five-star restaurant, they kissed as if no one else were there, as if no time had passed between them and nothing else mattered except that moment. No thought, no words, just two people with an intrinsic need to connect to something that neither of them understood yet, both of them knew that they couldn't ignore, and so they didn't.

* * *

**.**

**Olivia's POV**

For the next few hours, I didn't think about Elliot, or Mairym or what a complete mess my life had become. I wasn't worried about work, or my impending divorce. All that mattered right now was this beautiful, naked man beneath me, inside me, his large hands on my waist as my hips rocked steadily in a grinding motion. I literally felt as if I would cry at how good he felt. I leaned into him, my breasts against his chest as I sought his mouth with my kiss while I continued moving against him. Our mouths met once again and our tongues danced beautifully together; his hands sliding from my waist down to my ass, squeezing as he pushed up and deeper inside me, causing me to break our kiss and cry out. He quickly reattached his lips to mine as he put me on my back; it felt good to be his arms even if I wasn't sure that the reasons I was there were particularly sound reasons. All I knew at that moment was that I needed to be here, with him, like this and I knew by the way he moved that he needed it too. Tonight was about need. I'd worry about the repercussions another time.

* * *

**.**

**NEW YORK CITY. MERCY HOSPITAL.**

"Mr. Stabler?" the young doctor called as he approached Elliot in the waiting room. "You can go in now."

"Is she…the baby?"

"We did what we could but…I'm sorry, but at four months, there wasn't much we could –"

"four months?"

"yes, your fiancé was four months along."

"That's right." Elliot covered.

"It doesn't help much but I don't see any reason why you can't try again within a few months."

"Yeah. Thanks doc." He shook the doctor's hand before the doctor walked away. When he was out of sight, Elliot turned to the wall in an absolute rage and punched it so hard, his fist put a hole through it then looked back towards her room but went the other way, storming out of the hospital.

* * *

**.**

**LOS ANGELES. OLIVIA'S HOTEL SUITE. **

He looked down at her sleeping peacefully on his chest and he couldn't believe that she was actually here, in his arms and that he'd just made love to her. he thought that he'd never see her again, thought for sure that he'd spend the rest of his life pining away for her and that…. he was sounding like a love-sick woman but he couldn't help it. If he'd had any doubts in his mind about how he felt, they were gone as of this moment; he was in love with her! Completely and absolutely in love! There was no way he could allow himself to lose her again; this woman he barely knew, yet felt like he'd lived 10 lifetimes with has stolen his heart and he wasn't running away from it. He just needed to find a way to her heart but he wasn't aware that it would be a lot easier than he thought because even though she fought it, and was still so confused, he'd gotten to her from the very first time they'd met.

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**Hope you liked it. If you want more, hit the review button and leave some feedback. Thanks for reading!**


	4. Torn

**TWO UPDATES IN LESS THAT A WEEK? I'M ON A ROLL, LOL! ANYWAY, HERE IS PART FOUR, THIS CHAPTER GETS A BIT STEAMY, SO BE WARNED. THERE'S NOT MUCH ELSE TO SAY EXCEPT, ENJOY!**

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**A/N this chapter was wholeheartedly inspired by Letoya Luckett's song **_**Torn. **_**Check it out when you get the chance.**

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**NEW YORK CITY. MERCY HOSPITAL. MORNING.**

"Aren't you supposed to be mourning your baby?" Mairym's friend Stephie asked from the other end of the phone.

"Are you serious? I didn't want the damn thing to begin with! I'm glad it's gone!"

"And your gravy train right along with it!"

"Not even! I'll shed some tears, play the whole '_my precious baby is gone' _card and Elliot will be putty in my hands. I got this!"

"There's still the matter of his wife…" Stephie reminded.

What about her? It's not like he ever loved her!"

"HE told you this?"

"Only a million times! He told me that he's been looking for a reason to get away from her!"

"You can't be serious!"

"The day she caught us together, he really let her have it. He got in her face and told her that he was in love with me and told her to leave us alone and let us be happy! Anyway, he should be here soon, he's probably out buying me like a ton of flowers. Gotta put on my sad face; later babe!" she said and ended the call.

* * *

.

**LOWER MANHATTAN, BRIAN'S OFFICE**

"Babe… Babe I… I will… Alex! I will not be late!" he said into his Bluetooth while he signed the papers his secretary handed to him. "Okay. I love you too!" he ended the call just as Elliot walked into his office.

"All done!" Donna, Brian's secretary said as he signed the last document. "Good morning Mr. Stabler. You look like you could use some coffee!"

"No, I'm good, Donna, thanks. I just need to talk to my partner if that's ok."

"Of course, I'll give you two some privacy." She said before walking out and shutting the door behind her. Elliot slumped into one of the chairs by Brian's desk.

"You look like shit!" Brian exclaimed as he picked red skittles from the glass bowl on his desk and began popping them in his mouth.

"I feel like shit! She lied to me."

"Since Liv's not into tricks, I'm gonna go with Mairym, am I right?" there was a lengthy silence.

"She lost the baby last night." He said flatly.

"El, man, I'm sorry."

"It wasn't mine."

"What?"

"The kid wasn't mine. Turns out, she was already pregnant that night. She didn't want me going back to Liv so she told me it was mine. "

"El…"

"I was ready to go crawling back to my wife on my damn hands and knees and beg; literally BEG her to forgive me! But then Mairym drops a bomb on me and as much as it killed me, I decided to do the right thing for the baby and it wasn't even mine." He laughs hysterically at the irony. "I could kill that bitch with my bare hands!" Brian was a bit alarmed at Elliot's behavior.

"So what's your next move?"

"The only one I can make; get rid of her and get my wife back!"

* * *

.

**LOS ANGELES. OLIVIA'S HOTEL SUITE, 2 DAYS LATER**

**Olivia's POV**

Since he took me in his arms that night in the restaurant, we haven't been apart. He's like a drug. For the last 2 days, all we've done is fuck. We haven't left my suite, and the only clothing either of us has worn is a bathrobe to answer the door for room service! Right now he has me in the shower; my back is pinned against the cold marble wall and my legs are spread impossibly wide and pushed back, thrown haphazardly over his arms; my arms around his neck, pulling him closer as my lips devour his with kisses that are as hot as the steam that surrounds us. I don't know how I've been able to take so much of him these past two days; I don't know how I'm able to take him now – I'm so sore but even so, he feels amazing and right now, the only sensation that registers is pleasure as he thrusts into me slow and deep, grinding his hips against me as I cry out again and again. My legs begin to shake and I know that I won't last long. I'm moaning loud as I feel my orgasm coming and I bite his bottom lip, Trevor is determined to make this slow torture for me!

* * *

**Trevor**

No matter how much of her he has, he cannot get enough of this woman! The way she looks, the way she smells, the way she moans, the way she tastes… god, the way she tastes! He's been on his knees; his mouth worshipping between her beautiful thighs more times than he can count; her pussy has become his religion, her body, his God and he is a devout believer, steadfast in his reverence. With his mouth, he's just made her come violently and has climbed onto the bed where she lays, still trembling and kisses her perfect lips, her juices still on his own. As her hands travel through his hair, he finds his fingers at her clit again but she quickly pushes them away; she's far too sensitive to be touched there after having been whipped into submission by his tongue.

"No…no…Please!" she exclaimed when she was finally able to from coherent words then pulled him in for another searing kiss, wrapping her legs around him. "Oh. My. God!" she laughed.

"I think we need to get out of this suite for a while." He murmured as he planted kisses on her neck.

"That sounds like a great idea" she purred into his ear, while skimming her nails along his spine. "I just might have a little trouble walking." She smiled as she took his head in her hands and kissed him.

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**NEW YORK CITY. MERCY HOSPITAL. MIDDAY.**

Mairym was just putting the last of her things into her bag when Brian entered her hospital room.

"Brian, what the hell are you -"

"What did I tell you?" She rolled her eyes and sighed.

"Cassidy; what the hell are you doing here?" he stood with a smug smile on his face before answering.

"El asked me to pick you up." he replied, more interested in the gum he was chewing than the conversation or the person he was having it with.

"Ok, what the hell is going on? I don't see him for two days and he doesn't even come to take me home? What the hell is up with him?"

"First; bring it down. Second, grab your shit and let's go, time is money!" he said and walked out of the room. She picked up her bag and huffed out behind him.

* * *

**A HALF HOUR LATER...**

"Where the hell are we going?" Mairym whined as she looked out the window from the back seat of Brian's escalade.

"He wanted me to bring you to him." Brian answered, never taking his eyes from the road.

"Well, where the hell is he?" he sighed at how shrill and annoying her voice was.

"You'll see when we get there." He said and kept driving.

After a while, they arrived at a Howard Johnson's near JFK airport in Queens. Brian parked the car and got out, opening the back door for her.

"Elliot's _here_?" she asked, looking at the hotel in disgust.

"Let's go!" he said and put his shades on then slammed the car door when she got out with her bag.

Once inside, they walked through the lobby, to the elevators and went up to the third floor. When they got to the room Brian was looking for, he stopped to open the door and motioned for her to go in. She entered and was surprised to see Elliot sitting on one of the double beds. There was a ton of luggage crowding the tiny space, leaving barely enough room to get around. Brian stood in the doorway.

"Elliot, what the hell is going on?" he ignored her and looked over to Brian.

"Thanks man." Brian tossed him the room key.

"No problem, I'll wait downstairs." He said before stepping out and shutting the door behind him.

"Okay, what is this?" Mairym demanded. "…and, why is our luggage here?" Elliot stared at her with cold eyes; his beautiful blues now steely gray.

"It's not _our _luggage, it's your luggage."

"What are you talking about?"

"You lied to me." he stated as he got up from the bed and walked over to where she stood. The color drained from her face as her mind scrambled thinking how she would fix this.

"Lied to you? I don't know what you're-"

"Save it! I know that the baby wasn't mine!" _how the fuck did he find that out? _She wondered

"I-"

"YOU WERE FOUR MONTHS ALONG! I never even touched you until three months ago!"

"Elliot, I don't know where you got you information from, but I would ne-" he wasn't buying any of it.

"You tried to pin another man's baby on me all to keep me from fixing things with my wife!"

"I didn't know!" she cried. She would tell whatever lie she needed to avoid what she knew was coming.

"Bullshit! You set me up!"

"Just let me explain" she begged.

"I'm done listening to you! You were willing to let me give up everything when you knew that I didn't want this and you knew that that kid wasn't mine!"

"So, what? You go running back to that bitch now like a lost pu-" Before she could finish he had wrapped his hand around her neck and slammed her against the wall.

"You will never be even a tenth of the woman Olivia is!" he seethed. She saw the rage in his eyes and knew that it would be a good idea to just be quiet. "I am done with you!" he said before releasing her and walking away, toward the door.

"Where am I supposed to go?"

"The room is paid up for a month. You're a crafty girl, you'll figure something out by then!" he spat and walked out of the room, slamming the door behind him. She stood staring at the door, anger oozing from every pore in her body. She wasn't even concerned about the child she'd just lost two days prior; that was nothing more than the result of an ecstasy induced slip-up with a stranger in a club bathroom. But it had also been her way in; attaching her to the man she had wanted since she met him.

"DAMN YOU DEAD LITTLE BASTARD!" she cursed out loud to no one, then screaming as she snatched the lamp from the nearby table and hurled it across the room, breaking it against the wall.

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**SANTA MONICA BEACH. EARLY EVENING**

**Olivia's POV**

We did end up getting out of my suite that day and ended up driving to Santa Monica where we spent the day frolicking on the beach like two kids. Trevor nearly gagged on his tongue when he saw me in the pale pink string bikini I wore. And now, as the sun was setting, we walked along the pier through the amusement park, him carrying the giant teddy bear he had just won for me while I ate cotton candy.

"Today was nice." I said, smiling as we continued our stroll.

"Just nice?"

"No, more like beautiful…I haven't had this much fun in a long time." I said, tearing off a piece of cotton candy and reaching up to put it to his mouth as we stopped. He stared down at me as I slipped it in between his lips and he took my hand in his and kissed my palm, never breaking contact with my eyes as he slowly sucked the sticky sweetness from my fingertips. The sensation went straight to my pussy and I bit my lip, squeezing my thighs together as I felt myself begin to throb and grow wet. Suddenly, he leaned in to kiss me, his hand in my hair as he took my lips sweetly with his own. I was in flat shoes and had to stand on my toes to reach him but when our lips connected there on the pier, the setting sun as our backdrop and a soft breeze gently blowing my hair around my face, it was magical! We stood there like that, enveloped in that kiss, that beautiful, perfect kiss for what seemed like an eternity, but was in fact, just mere moments but when he finally pulled away, I felt cheated that it was over.

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**NEW YORK CITY, A DOWNTOWN BAR.**

Elliot and Brian sat at the bar knocking back tequila shots; actually, Elliot was knocking back shots while Brian was still sipping on his first beer of the night. He had never been much of a drinker and figured that with the mood Elliot was in, he'd need to very sober tonight.

"I can't believe I fell for the oldest trick in the book!"

"You tried to do the right thing, in the end, that's all that matters."

"But at what expense?" Elliot questioned just as his phone began ringing. He quickly picked it up from its place on the bar and answered it. "Stabler."

"Hey man, long time no hear; it's Mike!" the husky voice greeted from the other end.

"Hey brother. What's goin on?"Elliot was happy to hear the voice of his old friend from his NYPD days.

"Well that's the thing. I'm down here at the pier with the kids and I'm lookin at your wife, not even 50 feet away from me with some guy's tongue down her throat. Now maybe my eyes are goin bad but he don't look like you to me!" Elliot could feel his blood literally begin to boil as his face turned bright red. Brian noticed this and was instantly curious about who was on the other end of the phone."

"What?! You must be mistaken, Liv's not in California." Brian hung his head, pinching the bridge of his nose between his thumb and middle finger as he squeezed his eyes shut.

"I think you're mistaken brother. I'm lookin right at her, gorgeous as ever! And that body; Ohhhhh man! You are one lucky sonofabitch Stabler… or _were _one lucky sonofabitch! I didn't know you two were having problems."

"We're not. Mike I gotta go!" Elliot said and hung up before Mike could respond. "She's in California, isn't she?" he asked without looking at Brian.

"Yeah."

"Since when?"

"A few days ago. What did Mike say?"

"Nothing. Just that my wife is At Santa Monica pier practically fucking some guy on the boardwalk!" he picked up the bottle of tequila and angrily hurled it at the back wall, causing it to shatter. All eyes in the bar were suddenly on him.

"Stabler, what the fuck are you doin?!" The bartender yelled.

"I…I'm sorry, I…" Brian took his money clip from his pocket and peeled of a couple hundred dollar bills, putting them on the bar.

"That should cover it Sam; he doesn't know what he's doing. He's drunk." He said, pulling Elliot from the barstool.

"Yeah, well get his drunk ass out of here!" Sam yelled as he took the money from the bar. "You're banned for a week, asshole!" he yelled as Brian led Elliot out the door.

As they drove home in silence, Elliot looked over at Brian.

"Who is he?"

"Who's who?"

"Don't shit me, who's the guy she's seeing?"

"I don't know."

"Bullshit! Alex knows, so you know, who is he?"

"You really think Al is gonna spill Liv's secrets to me of all people? Knowing that I'd turn right around and tell you? This is the first I'm hearing about a guy, El I swear!" Brian continued driving as they sat in silence. After a moment, he heard what sounded like weeping and turned to look at Elliot.

"Are you crying?"

"What? No, I think it's the tequila coming out."

"Of your eyes?"

"Man, just drive!" Brian shrugged his shoulders and put his eyes back on the road. After a moment, he heard the weeping again but this time it was louder and when he turned to look, Elliot did nothing to try and hide it.

"El?"

"What if she's already had sex with him?"

"El, come on, Liv's not like that."

"I hurt her Brian! Women do crazy things when they're hurting; or looking for revenge." He started to sob in a high-pitched squeal as his face contorted into an ugly frown. Brian was now extremely uncomfortable.

"Aw come on man!" he said as he awkwardly patted Elliot's shoulder, twice while trying to keep his eyes on the road. "So she kissed him…so what? Liv loves you, and there is no way that she let that guy go any further than her lips!"

* * *

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**LOS ANGELES. TREVORS HOTEL SUITE**

He stood in the shower, arms outstretched, his palms pressed against the walls on either side of him while Olivia was on her knees in front of him, her lips sliding back and forth on his huge shaft, giving him the best blowjob he'd ever had in his life! It took everything in him to not scream out loud, her mouth felt so good around him! Instead he gave deep, guttural moans and sucked in his breath through clenched teeth; if it were possible to die from pleasure, this was definitely the way to go! He felt that familiar twitch in his balls and he knew that he was going to explode!

"Olivia….Oh god, Olivia!" his eyes were rolling backwards as she took her mouth off of him and stroked him with both hands. He came hard and she allowed him to shoot all over her breasts, planting a kiss to his tip when he finally stopped coming and that drove him over the edge. He quickly pulled her up and attacked her mouth with his own, his tongue deep inside as if he were trying to inhale her soul. If he lived a hundred lifetimes, he would NEVER be able to get enough of this woman!

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**Olivia's POV**

The next few days flew by quickly; way quicker than either of us wanted. We had spent the past week together making love and getting to know all there was to know about one another. I was still unsure as to what Trevor's place would be or could be in my life. I kept thinking that it was way too soon to even be considering such things but I couldn't deny that I had grown strong feelings; it just felt right being in his arms. It was our last night together in LA; I still had 5 days left of my vacation but he had to get back to Chicago and would be taking the red-eye out late tonight.

We were lying in bed under the covers, my naked body on top of his, my head on his chest listening to his heart beating as he played with my hair and we reveled in the afterglow of our lovemaking.

"Tonight you leave; then what?" I softly wondered aloud.

"It's whatever you want it to be." He replied just as softly.

"I don't understand." I said as I lifted my head to look at him; resting my chin on my hands.

"Olivia, call me a fool or crazy, even naive, but what I knew the night we met, being with you this week, like this has made me even more sure."

"Sure of what?"

"Sure that I love you Olivia!" I felt like the wind had just been knocked out of me, but in a good way; but in the kind of good way that scares you shitless and makes your mouth dry and your knees week. It's a good thing I was lying down!

"Trevor, you can't mean that."

"I do mean it. I mean it more than I've ever meant anything in my life. I'm a man who has always known exactly what he wants, and what I want is you!"

"Trevor…my life…me, everything is a mess right now! I don't even know if it's right for us to be here, together like this."

"That's what your head says, but what is your heart telling you?" I inhaled a sharp breath as I felt tears sting my eyes.

"My heart betrayed me when it led me to fall in love with a man who would break it. I don't really trust my heart anymore."

"Even so, what does it say?"

"It's torn. Even after the way Elliot hurt me…I still love him. But, then suddenly, there's you and there's this…connection that's so strong and I don't understand it but it's like kismet."

"I feel exactly the same way!"

"But it's not that simple for me. I don't know if this is my broken heart just wanting to feel better but for some reason, since Chicago, I haven't been able to stop thinking about you.

"Every day; every night. Olivia, I'd been going crazy trying to forget you but I couldn't; not one detail, I could even still smell your perfume. You got to me in a way that no woman has ever gotten to me before. I'm not naïve; I know what I'm up against, I know that your heart still belongs to him but I'm asking for a chance to make it mine! I know it's selfish to ask this of you right now but I feel like if I'm not a little selfish now, I'll miss my chance!" she sat up, straddling his waist.

"I don't know if I'm ready for that just yet."

"That's because you're over-thinking it. We don't need to put terms or conditions on it, we just need to be; throw caution to the wind and whatever happens, happens."

And if whatever happens doesn't happen in your favor?"

"I'll be devastated but at least I'll know for sure. But, I can't spend the rest of my life wondering 'what if' and kicking myself for letting the most amazing woman I've ever known just walk out of my life without even trying to hold on to her!"

"Trevor, this is crazy, how would we even…I'm in New York, you're in Chicago!"

"Planes, trains and automobiles…" I bit my lip and smiled as I looked down at him looking up at me, seeing nothing but adoration in his eyes.

"That simple, huh?"

"That simple. And if you need more, I'll make New York my home."

"I couldn't let you do that." I said as I caressed his face, slowly beginning to rock my hips against him.

"You couldn't stop me." he said as he put his hand to the back of my neck and gently pulled me down to face him, skimming my lips with his before putting me on my back and nestling himself between my thighs.

"I'm in love with you, Olivia Benson." He was staring into my eyes as he pushed himself inside me; my mouth gaped open and I gasped at the intrusion. "And I will go through whatever I have to go through to make you mine." He began slowly thrusting as I moaned beneath him.

Later that night as he prepared to leave, I gave him my answer.

"I want to try this. This connection is too strong to ignore."

"You mean it?"

"I do. But I need a little time."

"How much time?"

"I don't know; a week, maybe? I just…I need to go into this with a clear mind." My eyes were now wet with tears. "I think I might be falling in love with you too…no, I know I am." We were both in tears at this point and he had the biggest smile on his face. "But I'm scared because it feels like it's happening too fast and I don't wanna be hurt again; and the last thing I want is to hurt you! So I just need a little space to get my head together before we jump into this. Is that okay?"

"That's more than ok." He said and pulled me into his arms. We agreed that in one week, he would meet me in New York and we'd let things take their own course.

I spent the remainder of my vacation wandering around LA taking in the sites, doing all the cheesy, tourist things; the Hollywood sign, the walk of fame, studio tours; all of it bored me to death! I missed Trevor and everything in this city reminded me of him. I had no idea what I was about to jump into but I knew that I had to give it a try, not just for me but for Trevor. He was willing to risk getting his heart broken, I had laid all my cards on the table and he knew exactly where I stood when it came to Elliot; I loved him but I didn't want to be with him. But what if that changed?

I flew back to Home to New York and I felt hopeful. I would be seeing Trevor in two days when my week was up and I was feeling pretty confident about us. As soon as my plane landed, I had enough time to go home, shower and change to make it to Alex and Brian's rehearsal dinner. I had missed the actual rehearsal due to a delay with my flight but was looking forward to the dinner and catching up with her and Casey; there was so much to tell them both!

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**NEW YORK CITY. REHEARSAL DINNER**

**Olivia's POV**

That evening, I arrived at Alex and Brian's apartment for their rehearsal dinner party. As soon as I entered the apartment, I was greeted in the expansive foyer by Alex and Casey who proceed to hastily grab me by either arm and pull me aside.

"What the…"

"Don't talk, just listen." Casey instructed in a hushed tone.

"Oka-" I began

"Shhh!" Alex chimed in. "Elliot's here!

"What?"

"I totally forgot about the whole best friend/best man thing and Brian didn't uninvite him…slick bastard!"

"What do you wanna do?" Casey asked

"What do you mean _what do I wanna do?_ This is Alex' wedding rehearsal dinner! I will not be run off by Mr. Can't keep it in his pants!"

"She is so brave!" Alex said to Casey. "But, you don't have to be, say the word and he's out of here!"

"Al, its Brian's wedding too" I reasoned. "Nobody is throwing anybody out; I can handle it. Thanks for the heads up, but I'm fine!" I assured them and walked off to greet the other guests.

Later that night I was standing out on the terrace, enjoying the beautiful spring night, when suddenly, Elliot was beside me, he stood quiet momentarily before speaking.

"Beautiful night, huh?" it was indeed. 64 degrees, clear sky, it couldn't get any better than that,

"It's cold!" I said icily, without looking at him and moved away.

"Have you been doing ok?" he tried again.

"Why? Should I not be?" he sighed.

"How long is this gonna go on?"

"Until I stop hating you." I answered matter-of-factly.

"Liv, come on, I don't think you mean that." he said, touching my hand. I quickly pulled it away.

"Then you need to think again." I said while giving him a glare so cold, it sent shivers up his spine. He swallowed hard. "By the way, how's Mairym?"

"I wouldn't know; we're not together anymore." I tried to hide my complete surprise.

"So soon?"

"Olivia, you know I never wanted Mairym." I shook my head, obviously amused.

"Not gonna touch it…too easy!"

"Touché." He grinned as he stepped closer to me "I see you're moving on." I was momentarily distracted by the scent of his cologne. I always loved it on him, but right now, it was bringing back too many memories.

"What?" I asked, looking up into his eyes; his perfect and beautiful blue eyes that I was lost in from the very moment we first met.

"I know about the new guy."

"Oh, I see. You think that there's someone else in my life and you wanna know how serious it is; that about right?"

"I think I deserve that much."

"You deserve?" I asked, incredulously. "If I gave you what you deserve, you'd be a eunuch!" I spat angrily then walked away, but stopped. "And for the record, my personal life is on a need-to-know basis, and _you_ do not need to know!" and I stormed off, going back inside just as Brian was coming out.

* * *

**ELLIOT AND BRIAN**

"Did you talk to her?" Brian was anxious to know.

"You could say that; what do you know about this Trevor Langan?"

"about as much as you do. Of course, Alex knows everything but she ain't talking." Brian answered. Elliot grew quiet for a moment...

"I've been replaying the last few months over and over in my head; I made the biggest mistake of my life!"

"El, man, don't do this to yourself."

"Why not? I'm the one who made the choice and now I'm paying for it. Cas, I'm miserable without her; my life is hell because I lost the person who means the most to me in this world, and I did it by being stupid! ...if she moves on; I can't allow that to happen; I can't imagine her not loving me!" Brian put a hand on his shoulder.

"Come on. Let's go grab a beer!" he said and they walked back inside.

* * *

**Olivia's POV**

I entered the bathroom and shut the door, locking it behind me; leaning against it as I ran my hand through my hair and let out a deep breath, shutting my eyes. I never expected that seeing him would have such an effect on me; I've been trying so hard to get over the hurt, to get over the shame, to get over him.

I've never tried fooling myself; I love Elliot no matter what I might say, or do contrarily but I cannot live with what he's done. Maybe that makes me selfish or blind or downright stupid, I don't know. All I do know is that right now, my heart feels like it's going to explode! I hadn't seen him since that day in Chicago, months ago. He looks good; better…but maybe that's because I miss him so much. God, how I miss him! It's been five months since the last time we kissed, five months since the last time we made love…since I've woken up to his smile and until tonight, 5 months since I'd looked into those eyes and felt like I _wanted _to be lost in them again. I felt tears sting my eyes and quickly wiped them away; the pain he'd caused suddenly front and center and I remembered how that day, all I wanted to do was die and that Elliot was the one who made me feel that way. Everything had been perfect until then. _Absolutely perfect _I thought as somehow Trevor had, again crept his way into my mind. I still had no words to define this…thing I shared with Trevor, but it was strong and I was done trying to deny it. I needed it as much as I needed my next breath! I was easily falling in love with him. But, it's too soon. That, and the fact that I am still very much in love with my two-timing, soon-to-be ex husband!

"How the hell did you let your heart get you into this mess?" I asked myself out loud. Before composing myself and going back to the party.

Later that night, the guests had gone home and I was leaving to do the same when Alex stopped me at the door.

"It's still relatively early, let's go out tonight."

"I'm in!" Casey was always ready for fun.

"I'm out." I declined.

"Liiiiiiv!" Casey protested like a whiney child.

"Whaaaat?" I mocked. "I barely slept the entire time I was in L.A. and I'm jet lagged. The only place I'm going tonight is home to bed; have fun, I'll see you both tomorrow at the fitting."

"Fine! But tomorrow night…" Alex chimed in

"I promise, goodnight." The three of us shared a group hug before I left. Moments later, in the hall, the elevator finally arrived and I stepped inside, hitting the lobby button before leaning against the back wall as the doors started to close. Just before they could shut completely, a hand reached between them from outside and they re-opened. Elliot stepped on and I felt my pulse quicken.

"There are other elevators you know!" I reminded him as he pressed his floor. Why did he have to live in the same building as my best friend?

"Too late!" He said as the doors closed and he stood beside me on the back wall.

"So you live here?"

"Yep." We didn't make eye contact.

"How's that workin out for you?"

"You mean with your best friend hating my guts and giving me the evil eye every time she sees me?" I couldn't help but smile at the thought of Alex giving him the death stare.

"She is pretty good at holding grudges.

"You can say that again!" he agreed and suddenly, it was quiet between us as the elevator made its slow descent.

"How did we get here?" I asked.

"I don't know." He answered in a small, sorrowful voice. "I've been asking myself that question every day for 3 months." He finished then looked over at me before slowly reaching for my hand and touching my fingers with his so gently that I wondered if he even had. I felt a familiar nervousness inside my chest and just as I turned my head to look at him, the elevator stopped.

"This is me." he said as the doors opened. "Goodnight Liv." I swallowed the lump in my throat and croaked out a _goodnight _as he left the car. I stepped closer and sighed as the doors began closing again. Again, before they could completely shut there was that hand. The doors reopened and Elliot stood there between them, then without a word, his arm snaked around my waist and before I could protest, he pulled me close against his body and kissed me, there between the elevator doors; kissed me deeply and full of passion. I tried to pull away but his lips felt too good against my own, it had been too long and I had missed him so much and within seconds, I found my body relaxing against his, my lips giving into his kiss and returning it hungrily. I felt his strong arms lift me and before I knew it, he was carrying me down the hall to his apartment and I didn't protest.

We were both in a frenzy as we tore each other's clothes off and discarded them carelessly around his apartment. I missed him so much and just wanted him inside me as fast as possible. I was already so wet for him. Tears began falling the moment I felt him pushing himself inside me, not because he was hurting me but because being with him felt like home and when he began to thrust and looked down at me, I saw that there were tears in his eyes too. We cried the whole time we made love. It was beautiful and intense and every time he made me come, I loved him more! Deep down, I knew that I shouldn't be here with him like this, not after the way he'd hurt me, not with the feelings I had grown for Trevor, but I didn't care. All that mattered to me right now was being in Elliot's arms, being filled by him, loving him and feeling his love for me with every touch, kiss and thrust he gave. Right here, right now, in this moment time had stopped and there was nothing but us; at least that's what I told myself and I almost believed it until that final climax; when I came it was so powerful that I felt it in my soul and the scream that I had been suppressing for the last hour finally tore from deep inside me and I cried his name again and again, as if he were my God and I was calling on his mercy! Only, the name that spilled from my lips wasn't Elliot's, it was Trevor's!

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**Well? Was that shocking enough? Want more? Got an opinion? Hit that review button and give it all to me.**


	5. Strike Three

**HELLO AND HAPPY NEW YEAR! HOPE EVERYONE HAD HAPPY HOLIDAYS. SO I'M BACK WITH CHAPTER FIVE; YOU GUYS REALLY KEEP ME INSPIRED WITH YOUR LOVELY REVIEWS. JUST A WARNING THAT THINGS GET A BIT DARK, SO IF YOU'RE SENSITIVE, TAKE HEED. ASIDE FROM THAT I HOPE I'VE WRITTEN ANOTHER GOOD CHAPTER. DICK WOLF OWNS THE CHARACTERS, THOUGH I WISH THEY WERE MINE. ENJOY!**

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**ELLIOT'S APARTMENT, CONTINUED…**

**Olivia's POV**

"What the fuck did you just say?" his voice was full of ice as he slammed my arms down above my head, pinning them there then pushed deep inside me and began fucking me as hard as he could; his eyes had a darkness to them that I'd never seen and it frightened me.

"El, baby slow down." I was recovering from an intense orgasm and his harsh movements were more than I could take right now. I was also starting to realize the pain in my wrists; he had them pinned so tightly.

"You scream another man's name while I'm inside you?" he seethed, but he didn't slow down. "I'll fucking make you scream!" and he crashed his mouth roughly over mine, his lips demanding my kiss. I moaned painfully and turned my head, breaking the kiss and cried out; he was so rough inside me! I felt his hand grip my jaw and he jerked my head so that we were again, eye-to-eye.

"Look at me! I bet you don't sound like this for him!" I didn't recognize this man and I was truly afraid.

"Elliot please, you're hurting me!" I gasped, barely whispering. He was fucking me so aggressively that it literally took my breath every time he slammed into me! I began squirming beneath him trying to get him off of me, but his body was like a brick wall and I could not move! I had no choice but to lie there pinned beneath him while he brutalized my insides.

"You are MINE! Do you hear me? I am your fucking husband!" he growled, punctuating every word with a painful thrust, each one hurting worse than the previous; I thought I would pass out! This was not happening; I was not becoming a victim to the very thing I fought against every day; and certainly not at the hands of my husband.

"ELLIOT, GET OFF ME! STOP!" I somehow managed to scream, and it seemed to pull him out of his rage. He quickly released his hold on my wrists and pulled out of me; a look of pure shock and sorrow on his face. I lay there beneath him for a few seconds shaking and crying before my senses came back to me and I scurried backwards away from him. That's when I noticed the blood on the tip of his penis; my blood. I wasn't on my period; he'd hurt me.

"Liv, I'm sor-"was all he got out before I slapped him so violently, that it caused his head to whip to one side, eliciting a cracking sound from his neck and blood dripping from the corner of his mouth. I wasted no time getting out of his bed, my eyes blurred by the tears that wouldn't stop, making it hard for me to see.

"Olivia please, just let me..."

"DON'T. TOUCH ME!" I screamed, backing away as his hand reached for my shoulder. I threw my clothes on, trembling as I did. It killed him to see me recoil from him in fear and his eyes were now wet with tears.

"I'm sorry. I didn't…I don't know what came over me. I heard his name and…"

"So that gave you the right to…" I couldn't even speak it as a sob tore from my throat. "I don't even know who the hell you are anymore!"

"I'm the same man you fell in love with."

"No; you're not. See, the man I fell in love with could never be who you've become, and he would absolutely _never_ touch me that way you just did! You should be thanking God that I didn't have my gun with me tonight!" I said before storming out of his apartment.

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**SQUAD ROOM OF THE 1-6. THE FOLLOWING DAY**

**Olivia's POV**

I sat at my desk, a case file open in front of me. I needed to brush up on the details for the impending trial, but my mind wouldn't still itself to give me the focus I needed. Pair that with the pain that was absolutely radiating between my legs and this was shaping up to be a shitty day; I had been sore from sex plenty of times, but this was far beyond that. I continued to bleed through the night and was relieved when it finally stopped early this morning but I hurt; my labia were bruised, my thighs were bruised as were my jaw and neck. It had taken me an additional half hour to get ready for work this morning just so I could apply makeup to cover… I didn't want to think about this right now.

From his desk, Nick had been giving me strange glances all morning – he knew that something was amiss, and I could tell that he was turning it over in his mind trying to figure out what it was.

"Liv, you okay?"

"Yeah, I…why wouldn't I be?" I asked nervously as I began stacking the files on my desk; I needed something to look away to.

"Just…you seem…upset. You know if you wanna talk-"

"I'm fine." I said, finally forcing myself to make eye contact with him again. I knew that he wasn't buying it, but that was my story and right now, I would stick by it! I was relieved when Munch made his way over.

"Liv, this just came for you." He said, handing me a large manila envelope.

"What is it?" I was curious as I took it from his hand.

"No clue. A messenger just dropped it off." He said before walking away.

"Thanks Munch!" I called after him, preoccupied with the envelope in my hands. I looked over it; there was no writing or label of any kind on it. I got a bit nervous, wondering who it could be from; having gotten weird, and sometimes dangerous packages from criminals in the past, I suddenly found myself worried at what could be inside.

"You gonna open it?" Nick asked from his desk. I paused for a brief moment then opened my mouth to say something, but nothing came out. Slowly, I turned it over and reached for the metal fastener at the top, blowing out a deep breath before I proceeded to open it. There was a smaller envelope inside, still, no writing. I opened it and recognized the familiar blue backing on the papers inside as I removed them from the envelope and unfolded them. The first thing I saw was the handwritten note attached.

"_I'm sorry. For everything."_

"I knew the handwriting; it was Elliot's and the document I was holding were the divorce papers I'd served him almost 2 months ago, signed. I felt a tightening in my chest as I got up from my desk, papers still in hand and walked off, as fast as I could while trying to ignore my pain and keep my composure.

"Liv?" I heard Nick call but I didn't stop or turn around. Moments later I found myself in the bathroom, my eyes flooded with tears, chest heaving as I began sobbing, albeit quietly as I could, considering where I was. This was what I'd asked for, so why was I crying? One simple reason: I loved him! In spite of how he'd hurt me when he cheated, in spite of our vows that he'd tainted, in spite of the promises he'd broken and in the process, broken us; in spite of the fact that I was falling in love with another man, even in spite of last night… I've loved him for so long that it seems unnatural to be without him; even though I know that leaving him is the best thing for me. Yet, here I am, a grown, independent, capable woman, breaking down in a bathroom.

"How could you let things go so far last night, Olivia?" I asked myself out loud as I tossed the papers onto the counter and ran my hands through my hair. "He's not the same anymore, no matter how much you love him!" the pain between my legs throbbed terribly, as if agreeing. I closed my eyes, releasing a shaky breath as I held on with both hands to the countertop. My mind went to Trevor and I smiled so fast that it made me laugh even through my tears. It was insane to even be contemplating the idea of us with so much commotion in my life right now but I also knew that I missed him with every ounce of my being and all I wanted right now was to be in his arms!

I splashed cold water on my face and blotted it dry before going back to the squad room and grabbing my purse and files from my desk.

"I need to take care of something. I'll see you tomorrow." I turned to Nick and said; a strange look registered on his face before I turned, walking away before he had a chance to say a word.

**NICK**

He'd known that something was bothering her from the moment she walked in this morning; she just wasn't herself. Even with this breakup and divorce drama, he'd never seen her so unfocused. He watched her all morning, sitting there at her desk, her mind wandering to god only knows where; a pensive look about her as she turned over whatever it was in her mind that kept her so preoccupied.

The few times she had gotten up, he could see that she was in pain. Even Fin noticed and had shot him a look when she'd gone to retrieve her case files. She was limping and when he'd asked about it, she said that she'd slipped in the shower. If something were wrong, he believed that his partner would trust him enough to tell him; but then again, this _was _Olivia. She didn't open up very easily to anyone which was why he'd finally decided to ask.

"Liv, you okay?" she looked up at him with surprised eyes, nervous that he had even posed the question.

"Yeah, I…why wouldn't I be?" he could hear the nervousness in her tone as she began to fidget with the files in front of her.

"Just…you seem…upset. You know if you wanna talk-" he started, but, she cut him off.

"I'm fine." She lied, forcing herself to at him. Nick knew better. She was definitely not ok. He was about to press the issue when Munch made his way over to her desk and she was all too glad to divert her attention. When he handed her the envelop he was carrying, she just stared at it for a while before opening it and when she finally did, she was so upset that she got up and left the room, not stopping even after her partner had called after her.

She was gone for quite a while and when she came back, Nick noticed that her eyes looked red and he also noticed something else. When she'd thrown water on her face and dried it, unbeknownst to her, some of her makeup had rubbed off, revealing the bruise on her jaw where Elliot had grabbed so harshly last night. His heart dropped as his blood began to boil but she was out the door before he could say a word. Tomorrow, she'd better have a damn good explanation for what he'd seen!

* * *

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**ELLIOT'S OFFICE. TWO HOURS LATER**

He hadn't slept a wink since last night; so horrified was he at what had taken place in his bedroom…at what he'd done to her.

_ELLIOT, GET OFF ME__! STOP!_

He heard that scream in his head all night; a heartbreaking scream of pure terror that tore from his wife; a scream that his actions had brought forth. He'd never put his hands on her in anger before, never thought he was capable but he was, and he did; in the worst possible way, he did. The sight of her, his beautiful Olivia crying hysterically and trembling because of what he'd done to her…the drops of red that stained the sheets when he'd pulled out; she was bleeding, but it had never been his intent to actually hurt her and it was only when she'd screamed for him to stop that he realized that this was not something she'd wanted. He'd been an SVU detective for years and last night, he'd acted just like the filth he used to fight every day to put away, the only difference being that he stopped when she said no, but it didn't excuse his actions. There was unmistakable fear in her eyes last night and he would never be able to get that image from his mind as long as he lived.

"You really fucked up this time!" he scolded himself out loud, just as Brian walked in to his office, rapping his knuckles against the door as he entered.

"Fucked what up?" he inquired as he walked further inside. "Did we lose a client?"

"Nah, just…shit on my mind." Brian stretched out on the couch and put his feet up, busying himself with his phone.

"Somethin you wanna talk about?" he asked, chewing gum while he texted, not looking at Elliot.

"Not the best idea" Brian looked up from his phone.

"Come on, lay it on me."

"It's… complicated." Brian hit 'send' then sat up on the couch, putting his feet on the floor.

"Dude, jigsaw puzzles are complicated. We're boys, spit it out, I'm listening!" Elliot opened his mouth to speak, the though better of it.

"Forget it."

"I get it, it's about Liv… Look, we've all been friends for a long time and I love Liv, but you're my bro and I'm on your side no matter what." Brian assured him. "Hey, I know it hurts, her seeing this Langan guy but it's temporary; she's just actin out. Liv's a good girl, she'll be back as soon as she thinks you've learned your lesson."

"I signed the divorce papers." Elliot said blankly.

"You did what?" Brian asked, not believing his own ears. "El, are you crazy?"

"I put her through enough. I can't keep hurting her." he said in a barely-there voice. "Maybe Langan is the better man for her."

"Are you on crack? Do you hear yourself? _Better man for her_, Dude, my asscrack's a better man for her than that jerk!"

"How do you know he's a jerk?"

"If he's comin between you and Liv, he's a jerk as far I'm as I'm concerned and so what, you signed the papers, rip em up!"

"She already has them." Brian sighed deep as he hung his head and shook it; squeezing his eyes shut and massaging his forehead as if he suddenly had a headache.

"Dude what. The fuck?!" he declared before taking a deep breath and resumed chewing his gum then opened his eyes and looked at Elliot who was still staring out the window. "No big deal… she'll never file em!"

* * *

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**OLIVIA'S BROWNSTONE. UPPER WEST SIDE.**

**Olivia's POV**

As soon as I'd gotten home, I called a messenger to take the divorce papers straight to my attorney. I didn't want to wait any longer and felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders once they were out of my hands. As painful as it was, Elliot and I were done and last night was my wakeup call. I'd let myself end up in his bed and I shouldn't have; my emotions were still too raw when it came to him – I loved him, but I hated him…but I loved him; still love him even though I no longer choose to. He wasn't the man fell in love with, not the man I needed; Need. That's what got me into this mess in the first place. I allowed myself to need him.

"…_needing anyone, gives them the power to break you, Olivia. Want is one thing, but you must never allow yourself to need anyone, except you!"_

My mother would tell me this time and again and I'd done a pretty good job of living by those words until he came along. Suddenly, I didn't want to and now, sitting here with my heart in pieces and fully aware of how fast I was falling for Trevor, I couldn't help but wonder if one day I would _need _him? I kind of feel as if I already do in some ways; but, how can that be? How can two people who, up until 3 months ago, didn't even know that each other existed and, had since spent a total of eight days together fit so perfectly? Why do we feel so right? The week we'd spent together in LA was the happiest week of my life. No tears no pain, no worries no fears. I didn't miss Elliot when I was with him, I didn't blame myself for what went wrong. No, with Trevor I could just breathe, just be.

I relaxed at the thought of our time together and leaned further back into the pillows on the sofa where I lay. I was so tired and feeling the effects of the sleep I never got last light. I shifted, repositioning myself to lie on my side. Even with that slight movement, the pain began to throb, causing me to whimper, again taking my mind away from pleasant thoughts. All I wanted was to shut my eyes and sleep; hopefully through the remainder of this day. _Trevor would be here tomorrow._ It was the last thought I had before I felt my eyelids close.

"_You are MINE! Do you hear me? I am your fucking husband!" She could hear him screaming at her; it was so dark, she could see nothing the blue of his eyes, his angry eyes staring down at her and glowing furiously. She couldn't speak, couldn't scream; her mouth was gone, literally missing from her face, but she could feel him moving painfully inside her._

"_You're hurting me…" she said in her mind as she squeezed her eyes shut_

'_You're mine and don't you ever forget it!" he seethed as his eyes took on an even more sinister glow and she felt him tearing through her as her mind screamed!_

I suddenly jolted awake on my sofa and sat up, breathing fast and deep as my heart tried to pound its way from my chest! I caught a glimpse of the clock; an hour had passed.

"It's just a dream!" I reminded myself as I ran a hand through my hair and took another deep breath. Tears filled my eyes and began falling fast; I covered my face with my hands and pulled my knees against my chest; my body shook as I silently wept and rocked myself back and forth.

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**ALEX AND BRIAN'S APARTMENT. PARK AVENUE.**

Late that afternoon after their gown fittings, the three women – Casey, Alex and Olivia had gone back to Alex and Brian's apartment and now sat drinking wine in the living room.

"Liv, you've been so quiet all afternoon. What's going on? Are you okay?" Alex asked, concern evident in her voice.

"Not really." Olivia answered. She sat leaning forward, elbows on her knees as she nervously rolled her wine glass between both palms, not looking at either of her friends. Casey and Alex immediately exchanged a worried look between the two of them.

"Honey, is it Trevor?" Casey asked.

"Trevor and I are fine as far as I know." Liv answered before taking a small sip of her wine then setting the glass down on the beautifully carved table in front of the sofa where she and Alex sat. She began to fidget with her hands.

"Elliot." Alex sighed. Olivia gave a small nod but remained silent. "Did something happen?" she asked, moving closer to her friend while Casey got up from her chair and joined them on the sofa, she and Alex now sandwiching Olivia between them and putting their arms around her.

"Honey, you can talk about it, it's ok, that's what we're here for." Casey assured her. Olivia was now wrenching her hands and her eyes were glossing over with tears.

"Last night I – " she began but stopped as they heard Brian enter the apartment, calling to Alex from the foyer and quickly composed herself.

"Cabot, you home?" He yelled. Alex smiled.

"In here." She called back to him.

"I decided to take leave the office early and take my favorite girl out to – " He was saying as he entered the living room. "This is a nice surprise." He said at seeing the two women. "Hey, Case." he greeted as he kissed her on the cheek. "Hey, Liv." kissing her too.

"Hey Brian, she smiled.

"You two wanna join us?" he asked as he made his way to his fiancé and kissed her sweetly on the lips then sat on the arm of the couch beside her.

"Um, raincheck?" Olivia asked.

"Yeah, that's fine. How you holdin up, you doin ok?"

"I'm getting there." She answered.

"El, told me he signed the divorce papers… you guys really doin this, huh?"

"Yeah and if you don't mind, I really do not want to talk about Elliot." She said as she picked up her wine glass from the table but never took a sip.

"I'm sorry, it's just hard on all of us."

"I know." She sat her glass on the table again. "Excuse me." she said as she got up and slowly walked off, disappearing down the hall.

"Brian!" Casey scolded "Are you serious?"

"What did I do? And why is she limping?"

"Don't change the subject!" Casey continued. The truth was, she and Alex had noticed it earlier, they had asked about it but Olivia just shrugged it off.

"Okay, what is so wrong about friends discussing what's going on in our lives? It's not like it's a secret."

"But it's a sore subject for her." Alex chimed in.

"You too, Al? So I'm just supposed to sit back and watch my two closest friends make the biggest mistake of their lives without saying a word? Even though we all know that they belong together?" Casey and Alex said nothing; they simply exchanged knowing looks with one another.

"No, no, no! What are those looks about?" Brian asked, suddenly suspicious.

"It's nothing." Alex said and kissed him on the lips. "We're gonna go check on Liv." She and Casey got up and left the room.

"Damn women!" me mumbled as he picked up Alex' wine glass and took a drink.

"I heard that!" she called from down the hall.

**Kitchen..**

Casey and Alex entered the kitchen to find Olivia standing against the sink sipping a glass of water.

"I'm sorry about Brian" Alex said as she took a seat at the island counter and Casey went to the freezer.

"Al, it's not him, it's me. I'm all over the place right now!"

"Nothing that chocolate ice cream can't fix!" Casey exclaimed as she shut the freezer door and Olivia made her way to the counter and took a seat. Casey and Alex looked at each other, there was obvious discomfort on Olivia's face when she sat down.

"I'm not hungry." Olivia said. Casey and Alex exchanged nervous glances. It was Alex who spoke.

"Olivia, are you ok?"

"I'm fine." They both knew what that meant. Casey sat the ice cream in the sink and joined Alex and Olivia.

"You never told us how you got the limp." Brian heard Casey say from the intercom in the living room. _The housekeeper must have forgotten to turn it off again. _He thought. He was about to shut it off but decided that maybe if he could get the drop on the new guy, he could help Elliot fix things with Liv. So instead, he got up and walked over to it to get a better listen.

"So what happened? Did you hurt yourself at work?" Casey continued, hoping it was that simple but she and Alex both knew Olivia well enough to know that the details were in what she didn't say.

"I um… it's a long story."

"Is it what you were about to tell us when Brian walked in?" Alex wondered. Olivia was quiet for a moment, trying desperately to fight the tears that were stinging her eyes. She wasn't one to over-share, never had been, but what happened last night… it cut her to the core and she didn't know how to deal with it on her own.

"yeah." She answered in a small, frail voice. She was determined that she wouldn't cry but the tears were evident in her voice. It was another long moment before she spoke again. "last night…" she was wrenching her hands again. Alex, who was closer, put her arm around her.

"Liv, honey it's ok." She soothed, but the floodgates opened and tears began spilling from Olivia's eyes. Casey quickly pulled a few paper towels from the roll I front of them and handed them to her. This unnerved both she and Alex. Olivia was usually the strong one; they could both, literally count on one hand all the times they'd seen her cry in all the years they'd known her and still have fingers left over. Olivia cried for a long moment as Brian continued listening outside, pained at hearing her sobs. He hated to see a woman cry, especially one he cared about. After what felt like an eternity, He heard Liv's voice again. She didn't look at either Alex or Casey as she spoke, and with a shaky hand, she wiped the tears that were falling from her nose.

"H-he stopped when I said stop…" Tears were still drenching her face. Everyone –Alex, Casey and Brian felt their hearts stop beating and drop to their respective feet. They all knew from years of professional experience what a statement like this was usually a prelude to. Brian felt his blood boiling, and he began pacing angrily as he ran his hand over his jaw. He would kill whoever had hurt her!

In the kitchen, Casey treaded very lightly with her next words…

"Liv, you said that this was about what you were telling us when Brian came home…" she felt sick with what she knew this implied; she and Alex both did.

"No matter what I say, you do not talk about this! Are both of you clear on that?" Olivia asked, leaving no room for misinterpretation. Brian continued listening while Casey and Alex agreed.

"Come on Liv, just tell me who!" he said, listening with total concentration. There was a brief silence and then…

"Last night, after I left here…" Olivia began. They all listened as she tearfully recounted the events of last night. The kiss in the elevator, the lovemaking in his apartment and how she called out Trevor's name... how Elliot snapped when she did… what he'd done to her; she could barely get that part out through her sobs. When she was done…

"I will kill him!" Casey said, absolutely fuming.

"You'll do nothing!" Olivia told her sternly."

"Liv – "

"It's over Casey!"

"Over? That bastard practically raped you and you just wanna let it go?!"

"I already have."

"Really Liv? Because you don't look like you have; you're a complete mess right now!" Alex still hadn't said a word.

"I am; and I probably will be for a while but you know what? At least now I know! I know that there is nothing left for he and I, and I know that it was stupid for me to look back, thinking that there was!" she wiped her eyes. "I'm not a mess just because of what he did to me; I'm a mess because it was him, because it's Elliot; he was the person I trusted most to never hurt or betray me but he did! And he has, and every time he does it again it gets worse! " She licked the tears from her lips, then wiped them from her chin."I didn't tell you guys this to dump on Elliot, I told you because I need help dealing with it and I hope that you're able to do that for me; if you can't, it's fine but either way, I am moving on and I do not want any more drama added to this situation; so I am asking you both to just let it go!"

"I'm sorry." Casey apologized as she embraced Olivia. Alex was still sobbing, trying to compose herself.

"Alex, I need your word that you won't tell Brian. Elliot is his best friend and I can't have this between them."

"I promise."Alex said between sobs as she squeezed Olivia's hand.

* * *

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**ELLIOT'S OFFICE…**

He had just picked up his briefcase and was on his way out when his office door flew open and Brian stormed in, slamming the door behind him so hard that it shook the walls.

"You son of a bitch!"

"I thought you left for the -" was all Elliot got out before Brian punched him hard in the face, knocking him backwards, causing him to fall onto his desk. "Man what the hell?"

"What the hell?" Brian asked mockingly "You put your fucking hands on her, that's what the hell!" Elliot didn't have time to get his bearings before Brian snatched him up by the collar and hit him again, even harder, this time knocking him to the floor. "You sick fuck! How could you touch her like that?" he yelled as he delivered several swift kicks to Elliot's ribs, knocking the air out of him.

"It's not what you think!" Elliot said through ragged breaths.

"Not what I think…" Brian smirked, further enraged and delivered a final kick, this time to Elliot's face, knocking him onto his back. He quickly got down onto the floor, again, grabbing him by the collar and sending more punches to his face" I heard it, all of it straight from her mouth! She told Al everything; every sick, disgusting word!"

"Cas, let me –"Elliot began but Brian was too enrage to even consider listening and instead, he reached into his jacket and pulled his gun from its holster, putting the nozzle to Elliot's forehead.

"Let you what, huh? I DEFENDED YOU! I've been on your side every step of the way even when I knew that you were wrong, even when I knew how bad you hurt Liv; I defended my brother! But this?" tears fell from his eyes. "How could you do that to her man?" his voice was suddenly soft and emotional. "How could you hurt her like that?" he wiped his face while still pointing the gun at Elliot but more tears quickly fell.

"Cas, you're not gonna pull that trigger." Elliot said as he looked straight into the eyes of the man he loved like a brother.

After a long, tense moment, Brian slowly pulled the gun away and got up; his emotions threatening to crush him. He was being pulled from both sides. There was Elliot, his best friend in the world, the brother he never had and who he trusted implicitly and then there was Olivia. They had grown up together on the force, rookie detectives coming into their own and he loved her; and not in the brotherly way that everyone thought. His first year at SVU they shared a drunken night together; no one knew of course and she shrugged it off as a one-night stand but it meant more to him. She quickly broke things off and they agreed to be friends. Then she'd fallen in love with his best friend and he fell in love with hers. And even though he loves Alex more than life and would ever hurt her, he never stopped loving Olivia and wondering what could have been. Hearing what Elliot had done brought those feelings right back to the surface and it enraged him that someone had hurt her and even more that it was Elliot of all people who'd done it.

"Only because it would destroy Liv if I did!" he said and turned away, leaving Elliot in a bloody heap on the floor.

* * *

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**16****TH**** PRECINCT. THE FOLLOWING EVENING.**

**Olivia's POV**

After getting everything off my chest yesterday I began feeling better; lighter and actually got some sleep; a good thing considering how hectic a day it was at work. I hadn't had a moment to stand still all day. Then there was Nick, interrogating me about my limp and the bruise he saw; desperate to kick somebody's ass. I had to convince him that I'd fallen in the shower and I guess he finally decided that he believed me and he finally dropped it. Now here we were at the end of the day and I was desperate to go home and take a nice, hot bath. I stepped outside the precinct and into the warm evening air, barely noticing the town car that was out front until the back door opened and someone stepped out as I walked by.

"Hey Beautiful." I heard a man's voice call and it stopped me in my tracks. My breath caught in my throat and I felt butterflies in my stomach as a smile spread across my face. I turned around to see Trevor coming toward me, carrying a huge bouquet of exotic flowers. He stopped in front of me and I immediately reached out to caress his face and his thumb swept across my lips, his eyes locked with mine. I slowly drew closer, standing on my toes as our lips met in a beautiful kiss. I didn't care that I was standing outside my job or who saw, I simply allowed myself to fall into him.

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**There you have it. What do you think? Talk about it in the review section and please, check out my other stories if you haven't already! Thanks for reading!**


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